Jusssst in case you have no clue as to who Queen Nefertiti Nefereferuaten, (Gesundheit) was, I’ll enlighten you.
But, first, a photo of what she looked like.
Ok..ok..it’s not a photo. It’s a bust of Nef from ancient Egypt. (no one had camera back then (13 hundreds BC)
Hot lookin’ babe wasn’t she.
Anyhow, Nef was an Egyptian Queen and the wife of Akhenaten, (I guess Ack for short) who was an Egyptian Pharaoh. (no relation to Sam the Sham and the Pharaohs)
So not giving much thought to Nef or Ack, because who in their right mind thinks about ancient stuff other than archaeologists and seniors, I, of course, didn’t as well.
Until…..until I came across a news item that caught my attention.
The headline read, “Egypt Pledges Fast Work Amid Search for Nefertitti’s Tomb.”
So, being the inquisitive type, I said to myself, “Self, WTF is the rush to find Nefertiti’s tomb when she’s been dead for a gazillion years?”
I mean, ya think Egypt would have rushed to find her tomb eons ago. Why now? And, what’s the “rush” all about?
Well, apparently no one in Egypt was in any rush to find Nef’s tomb until some smart ass British Egyptologist (real word) Nicholas Reeves speculated that King Tut, who died at the age of 19, may have been rushed into an outer chamber of what was originally Nefertiti’s tomb.
So basically what this may mean is that Tut and Nef were in the same tomb doing Gawd knows what, and at some point archaeologists may have missed that point and overlooked the fact that perhaps Nef may still be in that very same tomb in what may be a hidden chamber.
Sooooo, now Egypt is hauling in some new radar equipment so that they can search for Nef’s tomb back at the same place where Tut used to hang out, um, I mean was laid out.
For years archaeologists have been searching for Nefertiti’s tomb because, obviously they haven’t found it, which makes complete sense to me, and also because she was so popular and according to records, (not the 45 rpm type) she was a stunning woman. Maybe even more stunning than Sofia Vergara.
Consider that in her time, Nef was so popular she had many different titles which include, “Hereditary Princess,” “Great of Praises,” “Lady of Grace,” “Lady of the Two Lands,” “Main King’s Wife,” “Lady of all Woman,” and “Mistress of Upper and Lower Egypt.”
Why she had all these aliases is beyond me. Cept for the “Main King’s Wife” one. Perhaps her husband, that Ack guy gave her that one figuring that if anybody tried to mess around with her they’d better know she was the “main kings wife” and if caught fooling around with Nef, off to a cozy chamber in a pyramid with no exits.
What made Nefertiti famous, besides all those aliases and her association with King Tut and her marriage to Akhenaten was her beauty which, as shown in that bust figure earlier, is one of the most copied works of ancient Egypt.
Probably because anytime you see a photo, or in most cases, a drawing of an Egyptian woman from back then they all have pointy noses and no boobs. But Nefertitti was a hot lookin’ woman so it stands to reason why she was the most popular. Then again, being the Queen, she most likely had access to Egyptian plastic surgeons who fixed her nose and enhanced her boobs. My guess anyhow.
And, if ya think I’m kidding about how hot looking she was, take a look at this limestone figure of Nef also in the Agyptisches Museum.
Wanna know how those pyramids got built? I’ll tell ya. Anyone caught ogling Nef because she was so irresistible was sent to the desert where they were assigned to build those pyramids and then, unlucky for them, when it was finished, were given permanent rooms with no exits.
So what actually happened to Nefertiti?
According to Egyptological theories, (which means they guessed) Neferitti vanished from historical records around year 12 of her husband’s Akhenaten’s reign with no word of her thereafter.
Speculation by whoever is that she may have suffered a sudden death from the plague that was sweeping through the area at that time, or succumbed from some other natural death. Possibly pneumonia from being half-naked all the time. My guess.
There’s also speculation that she fell into disgrace and just disappeared. Kinda like Monica Lewinsky. In any case, no one really knows.
OR….she may have just decided to retire and be a regular homemaker. Who knows.
But, there are quite a few theories regarding her death and burial but to date the mummy, (not Nef’s mother but Nef herself) has not been found.
BUT……yes BUT…..this year an archaeologist, Nicholas reeves, who we mentioned earlier, and is no relation to George Reeves who played Superman in the movies, announced that he discovered evidence in high-resolution scans of Tutankhamun’s tomb of “indications of two previously unknown doorways, one set within a larger partition wall and both seemingly untouched since antiquity.”
Which could mean in layman’s terms, “SHAZAM!…..Queen Nefertitti could be in there behind one of those doors guys!!!” Which is why all of a sudden Egypt is pledging fast work to find out if indeed Nef is in there.
Me thinkith if one of the major TV networks could get Monty Hall to host a Nef search when they locate those “unknown doorways” in that tomb would THAT be the reality show of all reality shows or what!
Soooooooo Professor Fersnock, what’s it gonna be, door number one, door number two, or door number three?”
“Um…er…….geesh…er……ok…..door number 3”
“Ohhhhhhh, I’m sorry professor, door number three contains the remains of 15 dead pyramid builders. BUT…..as a consolation prize, you get this miniature naked statue of Queen Nefertiti.”
So, in conclusion, it remains to be seen what Egyptian researchers using sophisticated radar will find. My guess……bones.
That’s the 24 million bartering system question folks. (Egyptians had no money back then and had to barter for things using gold, silver and other metals)
Which also explains why there were no toll booths in the desert back then.
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