Oscar Madison, (The Odd Couple) would be proud. Yet another year of the motion picture industry patting itself on the back for giving us all entertaining movies. 99.9 percent most of us haven’t seen yet.
BUT….doesn’t matter. As long as “The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences” thinks we will and who THEY decide win the awards. After all, who the f**k are we but mere movie buffs and DVD Netflix streamers who know absolutely nothing about what we think are good movies or actors.
Good thing THEY decide it for us.
BUT……have no fear Underdog Is Here!!!!!
Um…no, tis I, Mousefeet, just to add my two cents. Not about the awards, because as I said, we idiots have no say in that. But I do like to add my 2 1/2 cents about some of the attire at the Oscars.
Not that anybody gives a rats ass about MY opinion, but, because we movie viewers have no say about the awards, including yours truly, I thought I’d comment on other things……like…………
Kristin Chenoweth whose dress looked like a giant Anaconda started to devour her, she then killed it, and said, “Hey, think I’ll wear the suckers skin!”
Kristin Chenoweth
I have no idea who Elsa Patky is or who that is standing next to her. Well, we’re even. They have no freakin’ clue who I am either. But…she gets my award for, ” Holy crap…..I’m warnin’ ya out there in the audience, if this baby comes NOW….staaaaaaand back!!!!”
Elsa Pataky
The Albert Einstein look-alike award goes to…………………
Bill Murray
Why is it Goldie Hawn never gets old WTF!
Goldie Hawn & Kurt Russell
Watch it folks. Bette Midler can turn on ya in a second. I saw “Hocus Pocus” and I KNOW those are NOT her real teeth.
Bette Midler
Cate Blanchett obviously got caught in a blinding snowstorm with flakes as biggggg as baseballs. My guess anyhow. Otherwise, without those flakes covering her body she’d be naked.
Either way, she won the Oscar for Best Actress.
Matthew McConaughey got best Actor……he wasn’t naked either….although a lot of women wish he were.
And…….the best picture…….which as I said, 99.9 percent of us haven’t seen, is “12 Years A Slave.”
Cate Blanchett
Lady Ga Ga got the other half of that Anaconda snake’s skin.
Lady Ga Ga
When I first saw Julia Roberts in this dress I thought she had a tattoo on her chest. Hmmm…..maybe it is!
Julia Roberts
The MisfitWisdom Award for how low can I make my cleavage appear without those babies escaping goes to Kate Hudson. I was hoping for a jail break but it never happened. Damn!
Kate Hudson
And finally, Ireland Baldwin. WHO?
I said, Ireland Balwdin. Um……forget it…I have no clue who she is either. But she obviously couldn’t afford to pay to have the seamstress finish her dress or buy a pair of shoes. poor thing.
Ireland Baldwin
So there ya have it for another year of patting ourselves on the back for a job well done.
Cripes, they have awards for us bloggers but do ya think I EVER get a freakin’ nomination?
Then again, if I did WTF would I wear to the presentations?
And who would care anyhow.
I have no cleavage, I’m not pregnant, and hate Anacondas.
(sigh)
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I switched over to the show twice the other night. The first time, Pink was singing “Over the Rainbow,” so I switched back off and stabbed myself in the head with a fork instead.
The second time, Bette Midler was singing “Wind Beneath My Wings.”
Seriously: “Wind Beneath My Wings!”