Days You Should Be Celebrating In October To Get Your Mind Off Election Hype….Or Not.

october1 As all of you may know by now, I have not been writing my blog nonsense for a few weeks. In fact, I’ve taken a vow not to write until after the election in November. The exception being my monthly blog of events you should be celebrating just to keep your sanity what with all the insane stuff on the Internet. There is NO possibility of engaging in a civil conversation with ANYONE this election cycle.

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Oh yeah………I recognize ya now pal……….nice idiot costume

As an example, I present to you one comment that appeared on my Facebook page because I support Hillary Clinton. Which further proves my point.

hows this one…fuck you libtard.”

There ya go………I rest my case. So, that said, which I  just did, if you need a break from all this election BS here are some days you can celebrate without getting someone pissed off at you and calling you, as in my case, “a fucking libtard.” Then again…ya never know.

Anyhow……let’s all calm down and see what we can occupy our days with until this national election circus is over. First, celebrations the entire month of October:

Such as “Adopt A Shelter Dog Month.”

mmWhich also covers any guy in the doghouse…your choice.doghouse-cart

“Computer Learning Month” is also allmonth-long. My advice………learn to keep your stinkin’ cat off your computer.

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Nooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!

October is also “Cookie Month.” The ones you eat and not the ones your computer insists on attaching.

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I’m suffering from chocolate chip cookie withdrawal

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But….a lot cheaper

Also, “Eat Country Ham Month.”

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Similar to cat fur if you own a cat

And, “National Pizza Month.” Like we all need an excuse to eat pizza ANY month.

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Yep….I’ve already lost 80 pounds

Also, a reminder, NEVER eat hot pizza until it cools down a bit.

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Jusssst in case you’re a vegetarian, there’s “National Vegetarian Month.”

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And our last monthly celebration, “Sarcastic Month.”

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Nothing worse than a sarcastic bird

WAIT!!!! How about a sarcastic guy……..

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OR…..a sarcastic guy with male logic.

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Makes sense to me

Now for our daily celebrations. October 2nd is “Name Your Car Day.” Why? Who TF knows.

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Which is why I named her “Easy.” She never sez, “not tonight dear” when I wanna take her for a drive.

The 3rd is “Virus Appreciation Day.” Now why anyone would appreciate a virus is beyond me. Unless you’re looking for an excuse to skip work of course.

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The 4th is “National Kale Day.” Obviously celebrated only by women based on the fact that men hate kale, spinach, and broccoli.

 

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Bet it was a male hand

The 7th is “Bald and Free Day.”

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Works for me……um……the “rich” part.

The day everyone knows in October is Columbus Day” on the 9th. Remember those three famous ships, the Nina, Pinta and Santa Monica…um…no……

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Hmmm…..maybe it was the Santa Maria Shriver

Then, of course, lest we forget “Leif Erickson Day” also on the 9th.

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Huh?

The 10th is “International Newspaper Carrier Day.” If you were ever a newspaper carrier you know how hard it was to collect payments from your subscribers each month. Personally I never had that problem when I went to collect payments.

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Because I was Italian

“It’s My Party Day” we celebrate on October 11th. So, in memory of Lesley Gore, who sang, “It’s My Party,” here’s her song.

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“Old Farmer’s Day” is on the 12th. However, if you happen to be a young farmer, and are tired of hanging around animals, there’s hope for you. “Farmers.com” dating site. Caution…..no guarantee you will not link up with an animal.

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Throughly udderly modern

“Moment of Frustration Day” is on October 12th. Living with my other half I can relate to this and WILL celebrate this day.

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Little uptight are ya dear?

“Friday The 13th Day” is on……um…er…hold on a sec…(checking) Oh yeah, Friday the 13th.

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Like a cartoonists panel fallin’ on ya.

My favorite day in October is because I get to use one of my favorite cartoons. “Dictionary Day” on the 16th.

With fucking Splenda please

With fucking Splenda please

The 17th is “Wear Something Gaudy Day.” Considering the only clothes I wear are jeans, sweatshirts and T-shirts, I can’t celebrate this day. Now my other half…..er…..oops…I think I’m in trouble.

xx

If you’re not sure where your life is headed, October 19th is “Evaluate Your Life Day.”

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Another one of my favorite days this month is “Mother-In-Law day” on the 22nd. Yes, I DO celebrate this day because, (thank Gawd) I do not have a mother-in-law.

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“National Bologna Day.” (or baloney as I like to call it) is on the 24th. If you’re full of baloney, hey, go out and celebrate today pal.

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“Frankenstein Friday” (usually on the 27th or the last Friday in October) you can hike out to your local cemetery and search for spare parts. OR………if you’re into torch carrying just stroll through your town screaming, “death to the monster.”

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What happens when you hire inferior help

The 29th is “Hermit Day.” I am officially in the hermit stage now until after election day. I will be attending the Annual Hermit Convention through November 8th

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Along with my other half and my friend Tom Santos

As if Frankenstein Friday wasn’t enough there’s “National Frankenstein Day” which we can celebrate on the 29th.

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Um………depends Pete. If there are hot women in Hell send the bottom parts down below.

And finally, probably the most important day in October, at least for kids, “Halloween,” on the 31st. Check your kids candy stash carefully mom and dad………..jussssst to be on the safe side. Especially the candy corn.Where candy corn comes from...So, there ya have it, knock yourselves out celebrating these days.

Me……I’m gonna celebrate “Increase Your Psychic Powers Day” on October 31st and see just how good those fortune tellers really are.

I see Misfit that this blog will now be finished

I see Misfit that this blog will now end

Boy….is she good.

That’s it folks. Enjoy October. I’ll be laying low till after the election, and I’ll see ya on my November edition of days you should be celebrating.

Thanks to holidayinsights.com for a list of days.

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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