Reprise Sunday: Women Can Be Dangerous In The Summertime

As you know, if all of us could go back in time, we’d probably change a lot of things. Me being no exception.

Of course that’s impossible until time travel is perfected. With the exception being the number of times Michael J. Fox went back to the future.

mmmmmm

Obviously Marty went back in time before JEB!!!! bailed out

Anyhow, there is one option when it comes to going back in time. That’s going back a few years into my blog archives and reposting yet another dumb MisfitWisdom blog that was written in August 0f 2010.

So, considering how hot its been the past few days, I chose this one which was entitled: “Women Can Be Dangerous In The Summertime.”

mmmmm

Summertime danger

It doesn’t take much to distract me. You know how it is. One minute you’re thinking about something important, and then your mind wanders, and when you attempt to go back to what the hell you were thinking about, it’s gone.

And don’t give me the, “it’s an old age thing” routine.

It’s women.  During the Summer months, women make us men lose track of what were doing or thinking.  I would venture a guess that 90% of all accidents involving men have something to do with a woman.

Here’s just one solid example for you non believers.

Out in Everett, Washington there was an initial four car pileup on the I-5 highway that runs through that town.  Wanna know why?  Well I’ll tell ya.

WOMEN!pileup2

Yep, women…..young girly type women wearing extremely short shorts walking along the road distracting innocent male drivers as they just tooled along, most likely listening to their car radios and tapping their fingers to a nice upbeat Barry Manilow song.

Um, maybe not Barry Manilow.

Anyhow, because these red-blooded American males spotted these hot young women in extremely short shorts, they lost track of what the hell they were doing…..driving…….and crashed into one another thereby causing a four car pileup.

mmmm

Hee hee, look at those silly boys tryin’ to impress us Betty

As if that wasn’t bad enough, while state troopers were clearing up the highway and the young ladies standing nearby watching, more drivers, all I assume were males, crashed into each other.

Now is that proof enough folks?  Women are out to kill us.

I can relate to this dastardly act having experienced near close calls of a similar nature.  In the summertime They are scantily clad women EVERYWHERE!!!  What the hell are we guys supposed to do?  Ignore them?

It’s a plot I tell ya. An evil plot to make us men look like bumbling idiots.  And it’s working.  Just last night as I was exiting a building with my companion, a buxom blonde….and I mean “buxom”…..approached us.

Um....yah.....something similiar to this woman

Um….yeah…..something similar to this woman

So as not to appear fixated on her anatomy, (and the only comment that any guy can make while his wife, girlfriend or whomever is with him) with my other half right next to me, I sheepishly was about to comment to her how cheap she looked with those heaving throbbing voluptuous creamy white mounds of….um…..er…..

What I meant to say was that I was about to comment how cheap she looked exposing her body in public and that it was not appropriate for this type of environment.

Unfortunately I walked into a pole in the lobby while attempting to make my point sustaining a small but noticeable injury and cracking my glasses.

(heh heh….it was worth it)

But there ya have it.  How the hell can we perform everyday functions in the summertime if women are constantly flaunting their bodies all around us? No wonder the only work I get done is in the Winter.

Which is one of the many reasons my companion has a”to do” list a mile long for me to do come November.

In the meantime…….after I have my glasses fixed and my nose put back into place…….I’m going back to that building……..alone……..sit in a lobby chair……..with my cell phone camera……….and see if I can spot that (pant) woman again, and snap a picture of her.

Just to carry me through the long cold Winter months when there are no heaving, throbbing, voluptrous….um……

Neverrrrrrrrrrrrr mind.

Soreeee dear………………….

Pssssst........the dog's right.

Pssssst……..the dog’s right.

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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