Yep, this time of the year, if you’re into celebrating Christmas, which, as we all know, has become a hot potato as far as using the word “Christmas,” is what to give that special someone who already has everything.
I mean, WTF, if they already have everything what the hell could you possibly give them?
So, I’ve decided that I’d do some research as to some really unusual gifts you could give to those people on your list that DO have everything.
We all know someone who is a real pisser of a person. So what better gift to show that person how much you care than a subtle hint that the person you’re giving the gfit to IS a real pisser.
Women will love this next one. Pre-stained undies. Just think of the possibilities ladies. No more having to say, “Not tonight dear I have a headache.” All ya have to do is stroll into the bedroom wearing these and you’re guaranteed to not have sex.
Just what I’ve always wanted. A runny nose soap dispenser in my bathroom. Great gift for someone who has allergies or a sinus problem.
Lest we not forget our friends who own pets. Yep, anyone who own a pet will absolutely love this gift. Your choice of chocolate candy puppy poop or candy kitten crap. My mouth’s watering now.
AND, as long as we’re on the chocolate gift kick, how about chocolates in the shape of audio equipment, computers, cassettes, turntables and I think even a mouse. HEY! How many times have you yelled at your computer or snarled up cassette tape and wanted to smash the hell outta it. Now you can simply eat it.
If you love Sarah Palin, and you want to send her a gift, or, you just want to keep something around the house to remind you of the moose lady, here’s the perfect gift. A moose gloved pot holder. Yes, this can also be of use to those of you with perverted minds who live alone and are into moose relations.
Talk to the hand Bullwinkle.
Wanna make your house guests paranoid with Polaroid. How about this Polaroid camera toilet paper dispenser. “Ok Harry, a big smile on your face for the camera……HARRY! I said your face damn it!!!”
So there ya have it. Last minute gift ideas surely to be a big hit with anyone receiving them.
Or…..on the other hand, if they do not have a sense of humor, may be putting out a “big hit” on you.
My thanks to “The Huffington Post” for highlighting these great gift ideas that will surely impress those people who are hard to please and buy gifts for.
However, should they not appreciate your kindhearted thoughtful gift, wear this t-shirt under your jacket. It will definitely will convey your sentiments.
Then run like hell.
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