“Dear, Can You Give Me A Permission Slip So I Can Buy Viagra?”

v7

Let me see if I understand this correctly. A South Carolina Representative, Mia McLeod (D) has proposed introducing legislation that specifies that men who want prescriptions for erectile dysfunction drugs like Viagra or Cialis would be “forced by law to obtain and produce a notarized affidavit form from their partners, receive counseling and undergo a cardiac stress test every 90 days to ensure his heart health.”

REALLY!

All THAT to get laid.

And to think, before those reptile, um, sorreee, “erectile” dysfunction drugs all I had to do to have sex was either jump in the back seat of my De Soto and go at it or score in a bar and say that famous line, “your place or mine.”reptile2

Did I need a permission slip? NO! Did I need to get a prescription so I could get a hard on? NO! Did I need to get my Woody notarized? NO! Did I need to have my ticker checked for stress? NO! AND…..did my partner have to produce an affidavit saying, “hey, it’s ok if he jumps my bones.” NO!

No you idiot....not THAT kinda jumping bones

No you idiot….not THAT kinda jumping bones

Stop raising your hand....not that kind either...geesh!

Stop raising your hand….not that kind either…geesh!

If I had to back then, cripes, I’d have been spending a lot of time with my best friend….my hand. No affidavit required there folks.

Now the main reason this Rep. wants to enact this lame brain legislation is to steer the conversation away from abortion.

“McLeod doesn’t really expect this bill to pass, however she is hoping it will result in less misogyny, (hatred of marriage) among the many legislators who are introducing and passing bills that unnecessarily restrict reproductive rights in order to control women – bills that make it more difficult for Americans to get health care.”

Brief description of mys in a relationship

Brief description of misogyny in a relationship

Ok…so why waste your time introducing the bill in the first place?

Her response:

“Some people will look at the bill and say, “Oh that’s funny. It won’t go anywhere,’” and insisted she isn’t trying to be funny. Her goal is to shift energy away from the endless, obsessive efforts to restrict abortion and direct the focus to important issues and challenges such as flood recovery and roadway funding.

McLeod said lawmakers should not be debating abortion or erectile dysfunction. “I would be the first one to say that,” she said, and added, “If it means this bill helps the other conversation (abortion) to go away, and that’s a long shot, but if it gets folks to thinking about the important issues we need to think about, then it was not in vain.”

mmmm

Provided by Xfinity by Comcast on demand

Soooo, whether I get a hard on and have permission to get one and my other half, or yours, gives you a signed piece of paper saying it’s ok, THAT will focus attention on abortion? REALLY!

Like if “I’M” sitting in the South Carolina legislature and that bill is introduced do ya think “I’M” gonna be concentrating on abortion, or, thinking about renewing my prescription for Viagra or Cialias jussssst in case somehow they DO approve that bill. Might even get my other half to sign some permission notes in advance, say like 2 or 3 hundred of them….again……jusssst in case.

And go to CVS late at night to have them filled. Trust me on that one………v4

So let’s take a look at the representative’s proposal. (along with my thinking in parenthesis)

McLeod’s proposal:

  • Only a physician could write a prescription for erectile dysfunction drugs.

(Um, could my optometrist sign one too……he IS a doctor ya know)

  • The patient would have to sign a form acknowledging he was notified by his doctor of the potential risks and complications associated with taking the drugs.

(Yes….yes Doc, I KNOW about that four-hour side effect, but, hell, I’ll take the chance. I have a set of paddles and recitation unit in my bedroom…..for my other half….not me)

mmm

Oops…..

  • A doctor would have to provide a written statement, under penalty of perjury, that the drug is necessary to treat the man’s erectile dysfunction, which includes the doctor’s medical rationale for issuing the prescription.

(To whom ever this may concern: I, Dr. Stanley Zordorf, hereby attest to the fact that my client, Misfit, needs to have this prescription for erectile dysfunction filled. I base this on my medical diagnosis that without it I will be dead as he is holding a big gun to my head and weeping uncontrollably)

  • There would be a waiting period to get the pills. The prescription couldn’t be issued less than 24 hours after the man acknowledges in writing that he was notified of the drug’s harmful side effects.

(Oh great. Like how in the hell do ya time that! When my other half is in the mood….WHAT! I have to wait 24 freakin’ hours before I understand the harmful side effects? By that time, (knowing how a woman’s mood fluctuates) the desire would be over. For HER, not me)

You knew it was gonna come to this.....

You knew it was gonna come to this…..

  • The man would have to attend three counseling sessions during a six-month period after the drug was prescribed. The purpose, McLeod’s proposal states, is to make sure he understands the risks associated with the drugs, but also to inform him of non-pharmaceutical treatments for erectile dysfunction, including counseling and celibacy.
  • (Can ya see that scenario. I’m sitting in a counseling session, get a huge hard on after taking that medication, and the session lasts 4 hours. AND…..what red blooded guy is gonna pay any attention to celibacy. Whaddya they nuts!)

    Well.....

    Well…..maybe some guys…..

So once again here we go with some nut job legislator trying to make a point about what we (men) can do with our Johnsons and suggesting getting a permission slip to do whatever it is we wanna do with it.

Which also falls into the category of legislators, (mostly men) telling women what THEY can do with their bodies as well. Which I think was this legislators point in the first place.

In conclusion, I think in my next life I’m gonna skip the coming back as a human option. Too many complications when it comes to having sex. And, me being Italian, and hot blooded, which I suspect will also be the case when I’m reincarnated, I’ve decided to come back as a rabbit. Maybe like the Easter bunny. If ya catch my drift here.rabbit1

Noooooo prescriptions needed.

Just sayin.’

(my thanks to Kimberley A. Johnson for this article – @authorkimberley )

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Copyright 2015 MisfitWisdom RLV

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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