Apparently, according to an article by AP reporter Catherine Rampell, New York City has a biggggg problem with boobs.
No, not the ones that you run into asking for a handout, but the ones Playboy Magazine would be out of business in a heartbeat if they couldn’t show women’s boobs.
Lately women have taken to the streets in New York City’s Times Square displaying their (gasp) boobs.
Here’s a quote from Catherine’s article:
“In Times Square, a handful of topless women have joined the hordes of buskers, proselytizers, balloon artists and costumed Disney characters hustling for tips. Wearing nothing but thongs, feather headdresses and star-spangled body-paint across their otherwise exposed chests, these women pose for photos with gawking tourists and accept tips given in appreciation for being what they call “entertainers” or “ambassadors” of this great city. They offer a photogenic souvenir tourists can take home, frame and mount on their mantelpieces.”
Sooooooo, what’s the problem here folks?
As one commenter so eloquently put it, “Women are actually more likely (than men) to say their offended by publicly exposed breasts”. Shocking, absolutely shocking. I mean, most men just *hate* seeing breasts.
To which I would respond, (being a 100% red-blooded Italian-American male)…………NOT.
Show me one instance where exposed boobs have caused the downfall of an entire world civilization as we know it.
According to the article which quoted native New Yorker and self-described painted lady Angel Bunting, 32, “We’re just out here having fun, welcoming people to the city.”
YES! What better way to be welcomed to the “Big Apple” than being greeted with a set of “Big Boobs.” Seems to fit right in if ya ask me.
AND…..should you be planning to travel to New York City to stage some sort of politically correct protest against these women, or their boobs, keep in mind that New York’s highest court ruled two decades ago that allowing men to go bare-chested but not women amounts to discrimination on the basis of sex.
So take THAT ya damn panty waists.
But……call in the freak out police. Namely the New York Daily News, Police Commissioner Frank Reagan, ………um….wait…no, sorry, got that wrong, it’s not Frank Reagan. (I watched too many episodes of Blue Bloods and thought he really was the police commissioner)
That should be Police Commissioner William Bratton who has vowed to take on these boobs. Not literally, but legally. Although I’m sure Bratton likes them but, he’s just not into having them all over the Times Square area.
Flushing or Queens might be nice.
Soooooo Bratton’s idea to stop the swell (heh heh) of heaving throbbing boobs being exposed in public would be to tear up all the Times Square pedestrian plazas.
“Yeah…..no plaza to stand on and flaunt yer boobs ya damn bimbos….whaddya gonna do then?”
My guess would be just stand on a sidewalk. WHAT! Is Bratton gonna tear those up too?
Chime in Mayor Bill de Blasio who is thinking about commissioning a task force, (boob task force I would assume) to consider available options. AND, New York Governator Andrew Cuomo who sez he’s verrrrry displeased with the boob exposure problem and these “illegal activities.”
Um…hey Gov….did ya read the part where the N.Y’s highest court said women should not be discriminated against when it comes to boobs. NO? Um….ya better read it.
Now why all these politicians and save the world from exposed boobs lawmen are up in a tizzy over all this is freakin’ strange………considering…………this quote from the AP article:
“There is no shortage of problems afflicting New York, starting with its crumbling subway system, failing schools and strained police-community relations. Scratch that, there are a lot of problems in just Times Square alone. But somehow the Times Square emergency wasn’t sparked by its anti-Semitic Elmo; Woody accused of groping ; allegedly handsy Cookie Monster; that other Cookie Monster accused of shoving a toddler ; alleged pot-smoking, molesting Super Mario; alleged police-walloping Spider-Man; pugilistic Hello Kitty and Minnie Mouse; or even the area’s biggest taste-offender, the perplexingly popular M&M Store.”
Apparently exposed boobies are more of a threat to society than all that other stuff.
With regard to that quote I posted earlier from a guy who commented on this article when he said women tend to be more offended, he was referring to a “YouGov” survey that found women are more likely to be offended by publicly exposed breasts including “when a woman is nursing an infant in public, sunbathing in a park, walking on the sidewalk, or appearing on a magazine cover, newspaper front page, or late-night TV.”
Men, on the other hand, basically said, “Show me da boobs.”
Um, actually, women were more likely than men to say that exposed breasts should be illegal.
Geez….who woulda guessed that one.
My question would be, “HEY, where the hell do I get newspapers showing exposed boobs?”
Hmmmm. Must be a New York thing. The only thing my newspaper exposes are bras and underwear for women in their J.C. Penny ads in Sundays advertisement circulars.
Crime running rampant, terrorism, loony toons shooting up places, and what the hell are officials more concerned about…….boobs. Go figure.
Wanna know why?
I’ll tell ya.
Once again it is the, get ready…….the “politically correct” thing to do if ya wanna get votes or a pat on the back for taking on an issue that obviously will eventually destroy the world, corrupt the minds of little children, make animals go berserk, and without a doubt the worst thing mankind has ever encountered.
Next to ISIS………………which is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay over there far far away, and, as we all know, is no threat to us here….or, in New York city……
Like boobs are.
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