Don’t F**K With A Verrrrry Pissed off Cat

Now cats are supposed to be cuddly cute little creatures. Which is why there are a gazillion photos of cute cuddly furry little kitties all over Facebook and other social media sites.

Awwwwww, isn't she soooooo cute

Awwwwww, isn’t she soooooo cute

BUT……piss one off and boy are you screwed.

So back off motherf**ker

So back off motherf**ker

In case you cat lovers missed this story from the “Huffington Post” this week, a couple in Stamford, Connecticut had to call 911 because their cat was going ballistic.

So much so that when the guy called 911 he had already been stuck outside of his house for over three hours.catfight8

According to the story by the Post……………..

“Audio of the 911 call, placed at around 1:30 a.m. on Wednesday, makes it clear the man wasn’t kitten around, either.”

“My cat was getting too aggressive,” Mohammed Lokman can be heard telling the 911 operator. “I was inside and he attacked me and he started scratching my leg and biting me. So me and my wife went outside and now we cannot go in for like three, four hours.”

The operator responds, sounding a bit confused, “You said this was a cat?”

“Yes,” the man replied, later adding, “We cannot move. We cannot do anything. It’s so aggressive and so mad.”catfight6

Apparently the cat, which by the way weighs in at 7.5 pounds, became aggressive when it’s owner left the house after the cat had given birth the night before. So when the owner returned that’s when the cat became “ballistic cat.”

And, actually, officers did respond to that 911 call and helped calm down catwoman. I’m assuming I can call the cat catwoman considering it DID give birth to kittens, therefore must be a female, (woman) and we all know how well women can go ballistic.

HEY! Ever hear the term “cat fight?”

mmmmm

Catfight!!! Catfight!!!

Soooooo, the way I see this, owning three cats myself, if any one of them EVER went ballistic on me their little butts would be grounded. No cat snacks, clean your own freakin’ litter box, open your own can of cat food, (good luck with THAT) and no more stepping on my laptop attempting to post something on Facecat.

Ya think I’M gonna let ANY cat lock ME outta MY house!!!

No way Jose. (no disrespect to anyone named Jose)

Or any cat named Jose. Unless it’s a ballistic off the wall cat.

But, I really don’t think I or my other half ever have to worry about any of our 3 cats pulling a Freddy Kruger on us. Cept for that one time one managed to escape and I had to call 911.

mmmmm

Sir, could you speak English please

They damn well know where their bread, or catnip, is buttered.

And, all three of them have been neutered. So, no little kitties to worry about.

So, in conclusion “I” have nothing to worry about when it comes to cats EVER causing ME to be unable to get back into my house. Nope.

Now pissing off my other half and having HER locking me outta the house, well, that’s another story.

mmmmm

I’ll just never learn

Women, after all, are kinda like cats……if ya catch my slang thinking drift.

Ya have to think about that one.

Just sayin.’

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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2 Responses to Don’t F**K With A Verrrrry Pissed off Cat

  1. katydidknot says:

    I feel for this poor cat owner. We had a cat that flipped out on a regular basis. He was a male and was neutered, but he would stalk me, attacking me whenever he saw me. He’d wait for me outside a closed bedroom door so he could attack me when I opened it.

    He’d go ballistic. I would walk down the hall using a guitar case as a shield.

    My ex got some sort of air fresheners that were supposed to calm him down, but that didn’t work. We ended up having to give him female cat homones (seriously!) and it made him double in weight.

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