Ya see, my morning routine, after I wake up and realize I’m still breathing, is to stumble into the kitchen, lie on the floor and a half my other half pour coffee down my throat until I’m full conscious.
Then its a quick trip to my office, um, well, I like to call it “my office” but it’s actually a spare bedroom that the cats and I share, and I plop myself in front of my barely functioning computer to see what the hell is going on. Lest I miss something of great importance.
Like Salma Hayek’s boobs jumping out at me on my computer screen. Which they were, which I’m NOT complaining about mind you, but led me to think to myself, why bother wearing anything at all when ya go to the Cannes Film Festival.
And if you pay close attention to those camera men behind Salma, you’ll notice their cameras are at chest level so as to capture the girls, (boobs) when she turns around.
You’ll also notice that whoever took this photo also had their camera at chest, or as I like to say, boob level.
Why you ask so foolishly?
BECAUSE SALMA HAS BIG BOOBS AND THAT WAS THE ONLY THING WORTH ZOOMING IN ON YOU IDIOTS!!!!
For instance, look at these other* female celebrities and tell me if you see any boob zooming.
*For the record, these photos were supplied by “Getty Images” and as I said above, “take a look at these other female celebrities” and see if you see any boob zooming.
Now the problem as I see it, other than seeing Salma’s huge Mount Everest boobs, which really wasn’t a “problem” for me at least, is that in all those photos Getty Images never identified all of the women other than to list Hayek, Portman and Fonda.
Which is why I also followed suit and identified all the other women as Hayek, Portman and Fonda.
Clearly this is a severe case of overboobintinitis.
This occurs when you are overcome by observing voluptuous boobs and your mind, if you are a male, goes bonkers and your brain does not function well. As in the case of Getty Images when they attempted to post these photos but never listed the other celebrities names.
So, also being overcome by boobintinitis, I have no freakin’ idea who most of the other female celebrities are, I don’t give a rats ass who they are, and I’m still staring at Hayek’s boobs. Cause I’m a slug and a shallow person and still working on my second cup of coffee.
Wanna know who they are?
Go look them up.
Cause I ain’t gonna do it.
I’m still staring at Salma………..
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