It’s Sooooooooooooooooooo C-C-C-C-Cold That…………………..

It’s sooooooooooooo cold here in New England that I ran into a hooker today and she wanted to charge me twenty bucks to blow on my hands… da boom ba da bing…..

Well, you get my point here folks. Which is…..IT’S FREAKIN’ COLD!!!!!!!!!!!!


But…if you’re a real man……...

Anyhow, time for some of those it’s soooooo cold jokes.

It’s soooooo cold I saw a dog frozen to a fire hydrant


It’s sooooooo cold, instead of giving each other the finger, people in Minnesota are giving each other the mitten.mitten1

It’s soooooo cold I’m roasting my nuts over an open fire.

Along with my cat

Along with my cat

It’s soooooo cold the snowman I built in my front yard headed for a warmer place………………


Frosty goes rogue

It’s sooooooo cold I saw a flasher describing himself to women.




AND…..freezing your ass off isn’t just a saying……………..


“Oh f**k!”

It’s sooooo cold if you put your false teeth in a glass they chatter.



Where the f**k is Al Gore when ya need him?

It’s sooooo cold people aren’t calling the fire department when their house is on fire.



Yet another reason newsmen wear Depends

It’s sooooo cold inmates on death row are begging for the electric chair.


m mm

Well Maxine, you could always go with the boobs roasting on an open fire route….worked will with the nuts

It’s sooooo cold Hell actually DID freeze over. Which, gave those snowballs a chance in hell….so to speak.



Mr & Mrs Misfit observing our bird feeder

It’s sooooo cold my computer froze. Um, come to think of it, that’s normal….even when it’s not cold.



Totally udderly frozen


It’s sooooo cold, when people spot one snowflake they go into a state of panic.


OMFG!!!! Quick….WalMart…….bread, milk, condoms!!!!!!!

It’s soooooo cold a man is talking on the phone to a friend who lives in northern Maine, just near the Canadian border. The friend says that, since early that morning, the snow has been nearly waist-high and is still falling. The temperature is dropping way below zero, he says, and the north wind is increasing to near gale force. His wife has done nothing but look through the kitchen window and just stare. He says that if it gets much worse, he may have to let her in.

Finally, it’s sooooooooooooo cold, I finally had to let it all out………..


Ok….I f-f-f-f-feel m-m-m-m-uch b-b-b-b-better n-n-n-n-now………

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Copyright 2015 MisfitWisdom RLV



About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on and Kindle
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One Response to It’s Sooooooooooooooooooo C-C-C-C-Cold That…………………..

  1. Ms. Vee says:

    Funny as heck! Keep up the good work.

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