Australia Enters the “Biggest Boobs” Competition…..I think.

mmmm

Now folks, you NEVER hear guys say, “Geez, I wanna have the biggest Johnson in the world because…………….”

“I want to look silly and I want to be huge.”

At least “I’VE” never heard any guy say that. But, women saying that, with regard to having huge boobs, geez, it’s almost commonplace.

Step forward Australian model Sarah Marie Summer, 23 (no relation to Princess Summer Fall Winter Spring) who said just that, “I want to look silly and I want to be huge.”

mmmmm

Silly and huge….two birds with one stone

And she’s NOT talkin’ about gaining weight and looking silly, but getting a really big set of boobs…um….bigger than the ones she’s currently sporting, which are, according to who ever it is that measures boob sizes in Australia, the largest ones in the land of OZ.

Hmmmm. Wonder how much that boob measuring job pays?

In case you’re wondering just exactly what Sarah looks like presently, here’s her pic.

mmmmm

Sarah and friends

Now I’m no boob expert, but, it would seem to me, that if Sarah decides to enhance her boob size more than they are now she could risk the chance of never being able to purchase a compact sports car, or worse, never be able to remove belly button lint without some assistance.

She explains why, besides wanting to look silly and have huge boobs this way:

“They make people smile and that makes me happy so that can’t be a bad thing.”

YES! Making people smile. NOT a bad thing Sarah.

How about besides making people smile, (men) making them drool, ogle and get smacked around by their wives or girlfriends for staring at you. Not that men actually do that mind you.

I stand corrected

I stand corrected

Now I for one can’t imagine Sarah’s boobs looking any larger than they are now in that photo.

Um…..WAIT! Actually I can. (it’s a man thing)

BUT……WHY! I mean, if you were dating Sarah how in the hell could ya get close enough to her to give her a kiss with boobs even bigger than she has now? And ME, being a very short person, cripes, it’d be like planting a kiss on a pair of balloons.

Sure, a lot of men are into big boobs. Me not being one of them. You know what I always say, waste not want not. And, to me, big boobs are kind of a waste when ya think about it.

I mean, what’s the BIG (pardon the big pun) deal with having big boobs? I don’t get it.

Other than, as Sarah says, “making people happy.”

Summer taking a selfie of her selfies

Summer taking a selfie of her selfies

Small boobs don’t make people happy? I think throughout all of my entire life the biggest boobs that I ever fondled, (dating and being married) were a pair of 36’s. And look at me…..look at me…..I’m completely happy!!!!!

Do I need to be happier with huge boobs? NO!

Um, unless I was in an unfortunate accident involving drowning in a lake or on a sinking ship and someone threw Sarah into the water and, with her big boobs, acted as a life-preserver. Then, I might be somewhat happier.

mmmm

How some of the passengers on the Titanic survived

But take into consideration what else Sarah said about having big boobs. “She loves the attention her breasts have gotten her in her modeling jobs and on social media.” (I bet) But she said they, “Also cause her back pain and other everyday inconveniences.”

Um…..ok……what kind of inconvenience Sarah?

“I had to learn how to dance again and I often knock things over with them, or knock my drinks and spill it all over them,” she said.

Which explains why, when out on the dance floor dancing with various guys, most of them are lying on the floor unconscious after getting smacked in the face.

Watch outtttttttttt!!!!

Watch outtttttttttt!!!!

And perhaps why her bar tab is so high. Along with her monthly bill for her cleaners.

“Sooooo Ms. Summer. See you been out partying a lot lately this week. Ok, that’s 14 camisoles with vodka stains, 14 bras, one with an olive stain, and 6 with guacamole fingerprints on them…..that’ll be $30 bucks.”

As far as I’m concerned, the obsession with having the biggest boobs is getting waaaaaay outta hand, or hands. Literally.

As I mentioned earlier, have you ever read any story about any guy having a Johnson enlargement. Other than the Incredible Hulk. And THAT wasn’t by no choice of his own.

mmmmmm

Um, I may be wrong on that one

Me thinkith there should be a law that restricts the size that any boob can be enlarged to. For the safety of the public of course. And small guys such as myself. Oh yeah, and to help the economy.

Only because, as I see it, the sales of small compact cars will drop dramatically if women continue to enlarge their boobs thereby hurting the automotive industry. Next thing ya know those car companies will be looking for a government bailout or a loan.

OR, even worse, because of an influx of big boobs, go back to making those big gas guzzling cars in order to cash in on the big boob craze.

Honeeeeee.....can you turn on the ignigtion for me.....

Sigh. Honeeeeee…..can you turn on the ignition for me…..I can’t seem to reach it

SARAH!!!! For the sake of all mankind, and car companies, don’t make em any bigger for cripes sake!!!

We’re all happy happy happy with the set ya have now.

Honest!

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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