Ya see folks, the problem with me when it comes to having flashbacks is that most of them are triggered by listening to music when I’m out driving my big ass Dodge Ram 100,000. I’m talkin’ oldie music because I’m freakin’ old and have no damn clue what the hell today’s music is all about.
And I use the term today’s “music” loosely.’
So, where am I going with this? Why once again to my music vault to whip out stuff that gives me flashbacks. As I’m sure many of you get when you happen to listen to certain songs.
Which is why I listed a lot of songs between paragraphs and chapters in my autobiography, “I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love and Life Got In The Way.” (Amazon.com)
So, I thought I’d explain how some of these songs just haunt the f**k outta me when I hear them. Not that some songs don’t remind me of good times, like “Rhapsody In The Rain,” by Lou Christie. (1966) As I was having a “rhapsody” in the rain while that song was playing. Um, use your imagination there.
But the song that triggered today’s blog was “Wonderful Wonderful” by Johnny Mathis. (1957) SHAZAM! I was transported back to 1959 and Heilbronn, Germany where I was stationed in the U.S. Army.
Some sort of covert type spy guy befriended me and we were out driving through the German countryside and that song was playing. Of course I never knew that he was a spook until years later when I read about him in an article somewhere. Had I known he was some sort of undercover operative for the Army I would have probably associated, “We Gotta Get Outta This Place,” by the Animals. (1965) Lest I get involved in some sort of spy vs spy car chase stuff.
Then after that song played the next one on my home-made CD was “Lucille” by Kenny Rogers. (1977) Which brought flashbacks to mind of my second marriage.
Not that my second wife was anything like Lucille, and as Kenny sang, “Ya picked a fine time to leave me Lucille ya damn bitch,” (lyrics went something like that….or should have been) but that I recall being on vacation with my then wife, Lucretia McEvil, and wished that she had picked a fine time to leave. Like when I was doing 65 mph on the Maine turnpike .
But, there are some songs that bring back good memories. Like when she FINALLY did ask me for a divorce and I continually played, “No More I Love You’s” by Annie Lennox. (1995) I always thought she was saying “youse.”
Then the next song brought a flashback to my adolescent years when 78 rpm records were still around. YES…..I’m that old damn it.
There was this biggggg Victrola type record player in my grandmother’s basement that had a crank on its side that you had to wind up to make the records play. Kinda like my first computer. Um, actually, like the computer I’m using right now. I hate to part with things.
Anyhow, besides the foreign language 78’s my grandmother had there were a few neat songs mixed in that I really liked. (this was prior to rock and roll and 45’s)
So here I am tooling around in my truck and up comes the next song, “So Long” by the Weavers. (1950’s) Which I’m sure none of you have EVER heard of, and, will wish you never heard of after you listen to it on the link below.
But, to me, I thought it was great. Beats the f**k outta me why. But I liked it. So that song gave me flashbacks to my childhood years.
(note to my pal Willie Loco Alexander in Gloucester, Mass. Hey Willie! Here’s a pic of you listening to “So Long” in my grandmother’s basement.)
Fortunately, for Willie, it did not corrupt his mind and he went on to make his own music and denies that he ever knew me or spent time listening to the Weavers singing that song.
For those of you who have read my bio at the bottom of every day’s blog, you know that I spent many years as a professional disc jockey. Which is why I’m so famous today. NOT!
And that song reminded me of one of my first disc jockey stint at a radio station in a town that was predominately French. My flashbacks were about pronouncing those French names like Lamoreux, which I pronounced, Lamorocks. HEY! If ya damn name is Lamoreux and ya pronounce it Lamareau spell it that way for cripes sake!
Same goes for those dumb asses at Xerox. Spell it with a freakin’ “Z” you idiots.
Oh yeah, I also used to screw up on pronouncing “Yosemite State Park.” To me, it should be pronounced “Yoss Mite.” Not “Yo-sem-it-tee.” WTF’s with THAT!
Then, shortly before I pulled into my driveway, came “Foot Stomping” by the Flares. (1961)
The flashback there was walking through downtown Providence, R.I. with my pals at 2am in the morning and singing that song and at the exact moment we were “foot stomping” a police officer appeared and inquired as to just what the hell we were doing foot stomping at 2am in the morning.
Did you know that police stations at 2am in the morning are verrrry busy places? And verrrry scary.
Finally, just as I was about to turn my truck off, “W*O*L*D” by Harry Chapin, (1974) came on. Which immediately spirited me back to reality. Because THAT one song basically reminded me of all the years I spent on the radio as a DJ only to wind up here writing this stupid blog.
So, I was kinda depressed by the time I got back into the house and needed something to cheer me up after getting all of those flashbacks……some good….some bad.
So, I randomly grabbed another CD outta my rack, flipped it into the player, sat back, and the first song to play…………. “Nowhere Man” by the Beatles (1966)
Which basically sums up my life.
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