Every so often I need to take a “stupidity break,” which is taking a break from stupid stuff in order to regain my sanity. Such as yesterday when I wrote about “The Sarah Palin Channel” and, as Steven Colbert so aptly put it, “The Sarah Palin Channel, launched by Sarah Palin to let us all know that she still exists.”
So, to cleanse my mind of the image of gazillions of Sarah Palin fans whipping out their checkbooks and forking over $9.95 a month to make Sarah even richer, I’m going to reflect on how nice life was before I knew what the word “politics” was and long before Sarah was even a gleam in her parents eyes.
Driving back from a few errands I was listening to one of my oldie CD’s and heard the Statler Brothers do one of my favorite songs which is about what life used to be like when dinosaurs, such as myself, roamed the earth, and there were actually sane people roaming the earth along with me and, (gasp) people actually got along with one another. Imagine…………. what a concept.
So, here’s how it goes. Click on the video below, listen to the song and then view the various images that were mentioned in the song. Hopefully it may cleanse your mind as well. If not, you’re beyond help.
Flash Gordon, (not a guy who flashed women) was one of those TV serials we used to watch as kids. Now, as adults, we actually watch porno flicks where guys flash their “gordons” at women. Same thing but less violence.
Penny loafers had that little slit in the shoe top so that you could insert a penny into them. Why? Who TF knows. Rich kids used silver dollars just to piss us poor kids off. Bastards.
Speaking of penny loafers………….
Sock hops, for those of you too young to remember what they were, or, even know what a damn sock is, was when you took off your shoes or sneakers and danced in your socks at a record hop usually hosted by a disc jockey.
(note: if you don’t know what a “record hop” is or a “disc jockey” you should not be reading this blog)
Knickers……..oh yeah, knickers as mentioned in that song. These are knickers. Kinda sexy huh………
The “Hit Parade” was a TV show that featured people singing the week’s top hit songs. Realllly famous people such as “Dorothy Collins, Snooky Lanson and um……..WHO?
(I’m embarrassed that I remembered those names)
Then there was the other “Hit Parade.”
Sadie Hawkins was the brainchild of Al Capp who drew the comic strip “Lil Abner” and each year in Dogpatch, where Abner lived, they had a Sadie Hawkins Day dance in which the women asked the men to dance. The was due to the fact that no one wanted to dance with Sadie so that was the only way she could snag a dance partner.
Which I could never understand because Sadie was sure a damn knockout………….
Ducktail haircuts looked like this. I assume because it resembled a ducks tail.
Howdy Doody was also mentioned in that song. Here he is below along with Buffalo Bob Smith. (Howdy is the one with the red hair)
For those of you who do not remember Howdy Doody, here he is today.
Seams on hose, (not the ones you use to water your garden) were really sexy items back when the Earth was formed.
Cracker Jacks have been around as long as Alan Greenspan. Although I think Greenspan has been around a lot longer. We only bought them in the hope of getting a really great prize which was in every box.
However these were the prizes we always got……bastards.
When THIS is what we always hoped we’d find…………………bastards.
Ah yes. The “Boogie Man.” (Not to be confused with some old guy picking his nose and putting his boogers in some disgusting place. Usually under a park bench)
The Boogie Man was what your parents told you to scare the bejesus outta you.
“Go to bed Johnny, and you’d better behave or the “Boogie Man” will get you.
I never bought into the Boogie Man theory, but it scared the hell outta my dog.
Fender skirts were also something that you found on a lot of hot looking cars. Like this cool car……………
Well, maybe that wasn’t what you had in mind if you wanted to impress the chicks as you drove into a car hop……maybe this one…..
Cooties were not only a neat toy you could get, but nasty little head type bugs that you could also get. One you bought and the other you caught.
Captain Midnight was one of our super heroes.
Then there was Captain After Midnight………..
Today we have all sorts of chocolate drinks. But one of the most advertised ones was Ovaltine.
Hey, don’t knock it….even Frau Blucher drank it…….um….I think.
Then there was that pain in the ass guy who took the “Charles Atlas” course and kicked the s**t outta us skinny guys and took off with out girls….bastard.
Until WE took the Charles Atlas course and kicked HIS butt.
BUT…..then it went to our heads………………….
Roy Rogers and his horse Trigger. Um……Roy is no longer with us…………
But Trigger lives on….um, kinda….stuffed.
Heh, heh, heh, The Shadow Knows….heh, heh, heh……..(from the old radio show The Shadow Knew…um Knows.”)
He knows what was waiting for him at home….Mrs. Shadow.
Archie comics, (RIP Archie Andrews) featured Veronica and Betty who both were after Archie affections.
We kids, (males) were after Veronica and Betty’s affections. And used our sick adolescent imaginations to um, er………
Um….to picture them like this………
And finally the Statler Brothers remembering those lame Knock Knock jokes…..
And, in conclusion…..Knock Knock.
Spillane that last stupid knock knock joke cartoon.
It’s ok folks….I’ll be fine by tomorrow.
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