Now Their Screwing Around With My Freakin’ McDonald’s Happy Meals!!! WTF!!!


At least for one Connecticut girl

One of the joys I have is going to a McDonald’s, ordering my “Happy Meal,” and getting the “specific” toy I want. OK…OK….so I’m an adult. So freakin’ what! If “I” wanna “Happy Meal” so that I can be happy getting my “Happy Meal” by getting a toy in my “Happy Meal,” which, is the reason they call it a “Happy Meal” and NOT an “Unhappy Meal,” why shouldn’t I be able to do that, even though I’m all grown up. Don’t “I” have the right to be happy just like kids getting a damn “Happy Meal.”


Ya know what, forget the food, just give me the freakin’ toy

AND…..shouldn’t I be able to choose what toy I want in my “Happy Meal?”

“Misfit, welcome to happy happy happy McDonald’s. We’re soooooo happy you visited us today. Do ya want your usual “Happy Meal?”

“Um, yeah, I can hardly wait. What’s the toy this week?”

“Well, we now have a new “Happy Meal” toy policy in effect. I can’t really ask you if you want a boy toy or a girl toy anymore.”

“Um…we’re still talkin’ about “Happy Meals” here aren’t we?”


“Well, ya said, “girl toy” and I thought maybe McDonald’s finally got a grip on things and was going to offer us adults adult toys in “Happy Meals.”


But Ma, Johnny got Rover in a “Happy Meal” and he’s a  boy dog. I want a girl dog. I’m suing!

Now the point to all this “boy toy” or “girl toy” issue stems from a letter then 11 year-old Antonia Ayres-Brown from Connecticut sent to the McDonald’s CEO saying that he should change the ways McDonald’s sells their “Happy Meals.”

In her letter she says that, “I expressed my frustration that McDonald’s always asked if my family preferred a “girl toy” or a “boy toy” when we ordered a “Happy Meal” at the drive-thru. My letter asked if it would be legal for McDonald’s to ask at a job interview if whether someone wanted a man’s job or a woman’s job.”

My guess would have been, “Um, depends, which one pays more? I’d be happy to cross dress if it meant a few bucks more.” Ya think?happymeal6

So, after quite some time had passed since Antonia originally wrote her letter, (2008) McDonald’s finally gave in and said basically that Antonia was correct and that they would change their policy “without classification of the toy as a “boy” or “girl” toy and any reference to a customer’s gender.”

With the exception of RuPaul.


Hey Bozo! I resemble that remark.

And they added that they, “re-examined our internal guidelines, communications and practices with regard to how toys are to be given out.”

In other words, “Take this “Happy Meal” toy ya little twerp and be happy with whatever the hell ya get.”


Now THAT’S a REALLY Happy Meal!

Of course it didn’t hurt that Antonia’s dad, Ian Ayres, jussssssssssst happens to be a Yale law professor and economist who previously collaborated with his daughter on research on her complaint and then filed a complaint with the “Connecticut Commission on Human Rights and Opportunities.” (Happy Meal Division)


Ronald arrested for being insensitive to children ordering Happy Meals. Charge: Assault and pepper.

Soooooo, as I see it, if ANYTHING on the face of the earth bothers you that MAY seem totally insignificant to gazillions of other people, but not to YOU, then obviously, speaking for the millions of “Happy Meal” alienated kids, you should then take action.

UM, providing you have a dad who’s kinda like up on things and you don’t have to pay for your own lawyer.

So kids, now you can all sigh a big breath of relief. No more fearing that awful question from those insensitive McDonald’s team members when you want a “Happy Meal.”

“Do you want a “boy toy” or a “girl toy?”

OMFG!! The deprivation of it all. The horror. The trauma. Scarred for freakin’ life. (sob)


Um…ok…how about a somewhat happy meal then?

Now there ARE groups who applaud Antonia’s efforts. Calling her “inspirational and forward-thinking,” and “not too shabby,” along with Twitter comments such as, “smart,” persistent,” and “awesome.”

Antonia commented after all this, “The problem with “Happy Meal” toys may seem trivial to some, but consider this: McDonald’s is estimated to sell more than 1 billion “Happy Meals” each year. When it poses this question – “Do you want a boy or a girl’s toy.” McDonald’s pressures innumerable children to conform to gender stereotypes.”

Um….excuse me for a brief sec.




Besides, you little asswipes, I’m NOT gonna fall for that do you want a boy or a girl toy shit…so get lost!

Ok….that’s it. I’m not gonna subject myself to the humiliation of “Happy Meal” trauma anymore. I’m not EVEN gonna ask for a stinkin’ toy. Screw them! Keep your damn boy, girl or whatever toys Ronald.

I’ll just go to Burger King where THEY don’t ask me any controversial questions. They don’t even care if I’m a male or a female. So take that McDonald’s.

And furthermore………………………


Preferably an OREO

Oh yeah. And Antonia, don’t EVEN think of having your smart ass dad file anything with the “Connecticut Commission on Human Rights and Opportunities” claiming that the King at Burger King gives the wrong impression to kids about how to dress properly.

Take on something worth while that might be sending kids a wrong message.

Like why Donald Duck doesn’t wear pants for cripes sake.

AND….jusssssssssst in case someone, like Antonia’s dad gets the bright idea to sue McDonald’s because they think their food makes em fat……………..


As that famous philosopher Mitt Romney once said….

Just sayin.’

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on and Kindle
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