Yes, a once in a lifetime opportunity to bid on infamous gangster and no good nik Whitey Bulger’s personal effects. Or, as they say in gangster lingo, “poiseonal effects Guido.”
How about a one of a kind of treasure map showing where you can find all those hidden bodies cased in cement. Who knows, maybe even a map showing where Jimmy Hoffa is buried. Better yet, a rat-shaped cup that Whitey used to hold innocent pens and scissors. That is if you believe that Whitey actually would have anything that was innocent in nature.
“Ok ya dirty ratfink scumbag, one false move and I’m gonna stab you with these scissors, then poke yer eyeballs out with these pens, and beat the f**k outta you with my rat shaped cup.”
See, never trust an experienced gangster.
But, actually that rat-shaped cup IS up for auction. Along with more ratfink stuff if Boston, Massachusetts prosecutors in U.S. Attorney Carmen Ortiz’s office have their way.
No, Mr. Ortiz is not related to Boston Red Sox player David Ortiz, although it does seem rather ironic to me that both are in Boston.
Whitey, along with his moll, Catherine Greig were captured in Santa Monica, California back in 2011. He was convicted in 2013 and received 2 consecutive life terms along with an additional 5 years. The extra five years is a bummer because that means he’ll never get out of jail. He is now serving his sentence in a federal transfer center in Oklahoma city, Oklahoma.
So far they haven’t scheduled a date for this auction, but if I were you, if you’re into collecting crime memorabilia, ya might wanna keep an eye open for news about when they plan on having this auction.
You really do not want to miss out on even more stuff owned by Whitey that the police found when they arrested Bulger in his apartment. Like $822,000 in cash.
Um WAIT! Sorry, you cannot bid on that $822,000 in cash you idiot.
But you CAN bid on some really neat gangster stuff like a gold diamond claddagh ring with an estimated value of $48,000.
For those of you who have no idea what a “claddagh” ring is I shall explain for you. It’s an Irish ring that has two hands holding a crowned heart, (might be a real heart if it was owned by Whitey) and the ring symbolizes friendship, loyalty and love. Which, of course, are the traits of all mobsters. Unless you cross them. Then you’re basically screwed. So much for the friendship, loyalty and love part.
Police also recovered a replica of a 1986 “Stanley Cup” championship ring and a 40-inch flat-screen TV. Or was it a 40-inch replica of the Stanley Cup itself and a 1986 flat-screen TV. I’m not sure. Better check if you plan on bidding on any of those two items.
But, being the ordinary guy that Whitey was, police say that most of the items found in his apartment have no real value. But they’re hoping that they could appeal to crime memorabilia collectors or buyers.
I mean, just think of the great conversation starters if you owned any of Whitey’s stuff.
“Hey guys, welcome to my small party here. Boy have I got something to show you all. Remember that guy Whitey Bulger who was convicted of all kinds of dastardly stuff like killings and beating up on defenseless parking meters when he was the leader of the “Winter Hill Gang.” Yeah, well I got his actual Gillette Atra razor that he shaved with. And Gawd knows what else he did with it too.”
Now proceeds from this action will be used to compensate relatives of Bulger’s murder victims. So this is all for a good cause. So if you go to that auction and there’s really just regular ordinary stuff like a table napkin holder, toothpicks, a can opener, that flat screen TV, and a few Uzi’s and 38 caliber guns, hey, bid on them anyhow to help out those families.
If you question the ethics of this auction, keep in mind that other similar auctions have been held in the past to compensate victims of crimes. For instance, “The U.S. Marshalls Service,” (yessa Mr. Dillon) which is responsible for selling seized and forfeited properties, raised $232,000 through 2011 at an online auction of unabomber Ted Kaczynski’s belongings. Like personal journals and his hooded sweatshirt and sunglasses.
AND….a two day auction in Miami in 2011 brought in $3.2 million in the case of convicted financier Bernard Madoff which will compensate victims.
Some great stuff in that auction too. Fine jewelry, coins, and best of all, (and I’m not kidding here) 14 pairs of Madoff’s underwear. No mention as to if they were seized in Madoff’s dresser or in the laundry.
“Hey Alice, look what I got here. 14 pairs of Bernie Madoff’s underwear I just won at an auction!”
“Holy crap Herman, did ya check to see if they were used or not before ya bid on them?”
“Holy Crap???? OMG! Um….wait Alice, gotta run to the laundry room fast.”
Rich Kroll, an online retailer has his doubts about this auction stating, “Madoff was more of a celebrity. Bulger was a downright killer. I don’t even want anything of his.”
He may be right. Maybe this auction will not generate much interest……with the exception of Whitey’s claddagh ring.
Personally, my own opinion is if they had included some of Whitey’s moll’s stuff, (Catherine Greig) it might generate more interest. Like who the hell, besides that one pervert, would want to buy 14 pairs of Bernie Madoff’s underwear.
On the other hand, if they auctioned off 14 pairs of Catherine Grieg’s underwear, then THAT’s a different story. Washed or unwashed. You know how shallow us men are when it comes to women’s underwear.
So that’s the full scoop on this auction that possibly will take place sometime later this year. If you decide to go do me a favor.
If you’re browsing the items listed for auction and happen to spot any journals written by Whitey himself that indicated how he stashed $822,000 in cash in holes cut into his apartment walls and then sealed it up so that no one would discover that money, um, let me know. I might be interested in bidding on that item.
Only because I can never hide any damn cash from my other half without her knowing and I need a really good set of instructions on how to hide cash behind walls.
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