The Great MisfitWisdom Clock Caper: Subtitled: Hey Ma…look what I made!


The great MisfitWisdom clock caper

It’s not really a “caper” so to speak. But I couldn’t think of anything else to title today’s self-serving blog. Mainly because today’s blog deals with my creative efforts, other than writing inane stuff about stupid people. Although I do immensely enjoy writing blogs about stupid people.


A Batman and Robin “caper.”

Now most of you who are familiar with MisfitWisdom know that I was a former professional radio disc jockey. Which obviously means I love music and records. 45 RPM records to be precise. Which, anyone over the age 60 knows what they are.

Point: I walked into a Wal-Mart and asked a clerk if they had any 45 RPM record adapters. Her reply, “WTF is a 45 RPM record?” At which point I then thought to myself, “OMFG, why am I still alive and breathing?”


  45 rpm records. HEY! Look at the damn records ya damn perverts!

BUT…for those of you who DO know what a freakin’ 45 RPM record is, I have such a deal for you. Providing you’re still alive and breathing.

It’s a hand-made plaster of paris 45 RPM clock with none other than your favorite song label on the clock. Is that great or what! Um….especially if you’re just learning how to tell time.

If you said to yourself, “What is a 45 RPM record or don’t give a rats ass about what time it is on any given moment, bail outta this blog right now. Otherwise it will not only be extremely boring for you but also remotely resemble one of those TV infomercials that end with, “BUT WAIT…if you act now!”

Unfortunately I have no “But wait if you act now enticements.” HEY! It’s a freakin’ clock resembling a damn 45 rpm record, what the hell else do ya want? Mick Jagger delivering it to your house while he sings “I Don’t Get No Satisfaction.”


But WAIT! Act now and we’ll include a box of band aids jusssst in case you slip while using our chopper

Now you can go to the following site to actually order one of these one of a kind clocks and impress all of your friends. Or, perhaps give it as a gift to some ol coot who actually remembers what the hell a 45 rpm record is and will love you to death for giving such a wonderful gift. It’s at “” and in the search box key in, “hand-made plaster of paris clocks”

OR….you can simply go to the comments section in the MW blog and I’ll respond to any inquires there. Under an assumed name of course.

Now there’s a lot of competition out there when it comes to clocks made out of 45 rpm records. WHY! Because you can also buy an actual record made into a clock as you will see if you search “esty’s” site. But…..any idiot can mount a clock on a record for cripes sake. And…why would ya wanna ruin a perfectly good record in the first place?


Then again there are certain instances of justifiable record homicide

Whereas and forsooth my clock is not an actual record, but, resembles a record, and, obviously made out of plaster of paris. Unless of course you just want the record those other people are selling and will throw out the clock part. If that’s your bag, go for it.

“Hey, does this new Mercedes-Benz C Class with one of dem dere GPS systems?”

“Why yes it does sir.”

“Great!  Here’s my $34,000 but you can keep the car, I just want that GPS system.”

Soooo folks, as you can tell I have waaaay too much time on my hands, (“Time Is On My Side” by the Rolling Stones a clock option too) which is why I started making these clocks in my scientific lab with my assistant Igor. Who, by the way is also selling plaster of paris body part clocks as a side venture.


But WAIT! Act now and I’ll throw in an eye-ball clock

Now my own creation, excluding Igor’s body parts, may not be of interest to anyone. But, as I always say, to quote a famous philosopher who tried something and failed, “Nothing ventured, nothing gained.” (Mitt Romney)

But, if I do not sell any of my creations at least I will always know what time it is by the number of unsold clocks I’ll have around the house.

And I’ll always be on time for appointments.

Just sayin’

(Tomorrow’s blog, “Why stupid people try to sell stupid stuff on the Internet.”)

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on and Kindle
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2 Responses to The Great MisfitWisdom Clock Caper: Subtitled: Hey Ma…look what I made!

  1. katydidknot says:

    That’s a cool idea! I mean, not if you’re going to have Barry Manilow hanging on your wall, but generally, a good idea!

    I bet the same people who don’t know what a 45 rpm record is probably can’t read time on a clock that isn’t digital.

    • leilani parker & Richard Vittorioso says:

      You may have a point there about people and digital clocks. Hmmm…..which brings up yet another burning question: How do ya make a 45 RPM record into a digital clock. : )

      Click here for my daily blog.


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