How Do You Flip Off An Ex Wife? And live……


Technically speaking, this is the proper way to flip the bird to your ex without actually claiming that you flipped her the bird. Not particularly great for the bird, but will still give you some sense of satisfaction

The problem with having an ex-wife is as old as dinosaurs roaming the earth. Maybe even longer.


Yep…even longer…

Many of us males, who are still fortunate to still be alive after alienating an ex-wife, or two, will be happy to know that one genius of a guy, who has an ex-wife, decided to sock it to her in an ingenious manner. And, so far, he’s still alive.

In Orlando Lake, Michigan Alan Markovitz decided enough was enough. So, he took one giant step for mankind, or, rather, one giant finger for mankind.

Yep, he gave his ex-wife the finger. A very bigggg finger. Which just happens to be in the form of a statue erected on his front lawn, which, just happens to be located next door to his ex wife’s house.


The photo, showing the actual extended finger, was censored so as not to offend any manicurists

Is this guy up for some sort of a award for having taken up the banner of revenge for every guy who has an ex-wife.

Not that all ex wives deserve a finger erected next door to their houses mind you. But in this case it may have been justified.

Its seems that Alan’ s ex-wife had an affair with her new lover whilst still married to Alan and I guess that kinda pissed him off. So, short of doing a Texas Chainsaw type massacre, because I’m assuming Alan isn’t into chain saws or massacres, or he doesn’t own a chain saw, he did the next best thing.

Erect a 12 foot high finger statue on his front lawn with a spotlight, which, I’m again assuming, is pointed towards his ex wife’s house.


Yeah get over it Alan, it’s only the UPS guy

Markovitz tells “Fox News Detroit” that his plan was to get even at the ex-wife’s new lover, and never meant the for matter to be public. However, it grabbed local attention when the ex-wife’s daughter posted a picture of the statue on Twitter.

Damn! Ya can’t do anything creative these days without someone posting it on Twitter. Just ask former Congressman Anthony Weiner and Toronto Mayor Rob #!!&*#!#! Ford.

So what is this all going to lead to?


Exactly my point

Yep. It’s going to lead to more guys following the lead of Markovitz. I see it comin’ down the ol pike.

So watch out ex wives. Right at this very moment thousands of guys who have ex wives are thinking to themselves, “Hey….what a great idea! Hmmm, what can I come up with to get even with MY ex-wife?”

Having two ex wives myself, I never attempted to get even with any of them. Nor did I ever think about erecting a giant 12 foot statue finger. Maybe flipping them the actual finger, but not erecting a statue. Only because I couldn’t afford to buy a house next door to any of my ex wives. AND….when ya think about it, why in the hell would I wanna live next door to ANY of my ex wives anyhow.

I mean, revenge is one thing. But buying a house next door to an ex-wife just to give her the finger. Cripes, take a photo of your damn finger and send it to her in the mail. A lot cheaper plus it keeps the Postal Service in business.


Then there’s this option if ya really wanna have the final word….or bird

Or just post your finger on Twitter of Facebook. OR….if you really wanna make your point, and you’re a bit on the demented side, you could always cut off your middle finger and mail it to her. Um….maybeeeee not…..too painful.

Unless you could substitute a finger from a chicken or something. If you could actually get a chicken finger to form a flip off type finger. Have to check that one out.

There was no mention in this story as to the reaction of the former Mrs. Markovitz, or her lover, with whom she is now living with.


Mr. Markovitz discovers that his ex wife has also turned his dog against him

My thought would be that besides her being somewhat pissed off, that she might retaliate with some sort of statue of her own. Maybe a giant sculpture of an ass which faces her ex husband’s property.

Or perhaps a sculpture resembling her ex husband, naked, which shows him sporting a very small penis and a sign attached to it that says, “Hey Bozo, take your big statue finger and try to find your manhood ya jerk!”

There may be no end to this statue battle. Next thing you know they’ll be all sorts of competing statues on both front lawns resembling a giant orgy. Statue body parts all over the place.


Kinda like the one I have in my own driveway

At which point the Orchard Lake town fathers will have to step in and create a ordiance banning various statue body parts from being displayed on people’s front lawns.

Um….would  pink flamingos fall into that category?

After all, it IS a bird, and when you give someone the middle finger it IS considered giving them the bird.

Then there was a man who said, “I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late.”

Just sayin.’

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on and Kindle
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2 Responses to How Do You Flip Off An Ex Wife? And live……

  1. katydidknot says:

    At a certain point, even Alan Markovitz has to move past the grudge.
    (And when he DOES, I’d love to buy that hand off of him for my own ex!)

    • leilani parker & Richard Vittorioso says:

      Can’t hurt….send him an e-mail and make him an offer he can’t refuse. Sign it, “Don Corleone.”

         Click here for my daily blog.


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