Hey! So What If I Use Slang. Ya Understand Me Don’t Ya…

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Soooo THAT’s what that means….

As you all know by now, when I write, I like to use a lot of slang words. WHY Because that’s the way I normally talk. Well, not really, but after years of being a professional radio broadcast disc jockey and having to pronounce my words exactly, I always said to myself, “Self, when you retire, screw talking the Kings English.”

Besides, who the hell needs to talk perfectly anyhow. What with all those abbreviations on Facebook and Twitter and every other social media site.

You know WTF, (oops, that’s one) I’m talking about. Those “LOL’s,” and “LMFAO” thingys.

AND…..everybody I run into knows exactly what the hell I’m saying when I use slang anyhow.

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Huh?

Growing up I used to pronounce “sandwich” as “sangwich.” Did anybody correct me? NO! Did I get my freakin’ “sangwich?” YES! So what the hell is the problem?

Here’s another one for ya. (ya being another one)

If someone came up to you and said, “jeet.”  Would you be baffled? Well not me, OR my other half. She knows exactly what I’m asking. “Jeet” is short for, “Did you eat.” How simple is that!

I dunno, (yep, another one) maybe it’s a New England thing. To go along with “jeet” my other half’s response would be, “turley.”  Which obviously means, “It’s too early.”

At which point I always reply, “snot.”  Which means, “it’s not.” Which can also mean you have a booger hangin’ outta your nose. So, “snot” can be used in either case.

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YES! Poke-in-nose……in upstate New York.

So using all of those slang terms by shortening some of the words is fine with me. Which is why I take the exception to Charles Krauthammer, (obviously a guy that should have forgone his journalistic career and starred in old NAZI movies) when he’s either on TV giving an interview or writing an article for some magazine or newspaper.

The guy is a freakin’ word nut. He tends to use words that no one in there right mind uses. I can’t even read any of his articles beyond the first paragraph without having to drag out my Funk & Wagnells to figure out what the hell he’s talking about. And by then, I’ve lost interest in what the hell he was writing about in the first place.

Damn! Give me some newspaper and magazine articles written by the people who print “Highlights” and “Jack and Jill” magazines.

I suspect Krauthammer has never used the slang term for “intercourse” either.

Then again, considering Krauthammer is not much in the looks department, he most likely never had to use the word intercourse. Never mind actually have it. I mean, look at this guy.

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This is either Charles Krauthammer or Adrian Monk.

So I’m sticking with my damn slang.

If it was good enough for Clark Gable in “Gone With The Wind” when he turned to Scarlett and said, “Frankly scallop, I don’t give a clam.” then it’s good enough for me too. Scarlett knew what Clark meant, So what’s the problem.

Just like now when I turned to my other half and said, “jewwannaeat?”

Which, obviously means “do you want to eat.” How simple is that!

Unless you’re Jewish, in which case it could have an entirely different meaning. Not being Jewish, I have no idea what it could possibly mean, but, if it’s offensive, my apologies.

There are a lot more of those shortened slang words that I tend to use but unless I write them down, or just happen to catch myself using them, I couldn’t really think of any more.

So,having a brain block, I asked my other half if she could think of any. She thought for a moment, and said “no,” then said, “kenyew?”

Eureka! Another one. “kenyew.” Which you all know means, “can you.”

I think I’m going to have to start making a list of all those slang words and save them for another blog. Trouble is, I talk that way on a consistent basis so it just seems normal to me. So how the hell would I know if it was slang or not?

Damn.

Hmmmm. Maybe that’s why I’m not on the radio anymore.

No one can understand WTF I’m talkin’ about.

Now leaf me alone.

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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