Forgive me father…for I have sinned. (farted) Censored by Facebook.

m

Unclick farting as well…..

Writing a humor blog does have its consequences. At one time or another you are going to offend someone. The nature of the beast. This is obviously due to the fact that there are people on the face of this Earth that do not have a sense of humor.

We usually single them out as politicians, lawyers and ex wives. In my case, I seem to have offended the censors at “Facebook” when I wrote yesterday’s blog about…(gasp) flatulence. The unspoken subject that apparently is banned at Facebook headquarters, where, possibly no one on their staff actually farts or can discuss farting.

Either that, or they have a lot of air fresheners at Facebook headquarters and very loud music so you can’t hear if anyone farts there. My guess anyhow.

m

Hey…if they censored farts, what the hell do ya think they’re gonna do with “dung.?”

In case you missed that smelly blog, (10/28/13) it dealt with a British inventor who came up with the idea of designing underwear that suppresses odors released from of all things…..farting.

So naturally, as in naturally farting, I picked up on this story and wrote about it as a public service for those of you who have a farting problem.

Um…actually I wrote about it because I thought it was really funny that a bunch of guys got together in a lab somewhere and decided to solve the farting odor problem. Which, as we all know, if not solved, will be the destruction of mankind as we know it.

m

But usually isn’t censored….just words are.

So, as usual, I went on my Facebook page and posted my daily link so that my followers could read the blog. SHAZAM!  Up pops a message from Facebook that they found something offensive.

Considering, I assume, they could not actually smell any farts, I assumed they were offended by the word “fart” and went into a state of panic. The message from FB said that I could dispute their blocking of my post and gave me a little message board with which to do so. Which I immediately took advantage of, and, as of this blog, have not received a response from them.

Now folks, since when did the word “fart” or “farting” become an offensive word? Farting and being trapped in the vicinity of a fart, to me, would be offensive, but, considering Facebook does not have smellovision, nor can anyone on any Facebook site actually smell an offensive fart, WTF is their problem?

m

Which I myself do on a daily basis….and get censored on top of it….go figure

I don’t get it. Yes…..I know THIS blog will also be censored on FB as well. Do I give a rats ass? NO! Actually “rats ass” may be offensive too. Damn!

Now I’ve been posting my link on FB once a day for the past 5 years. Not once have I been censored. Have I seen offensive words and cartoons on FB worse than me writing the word “fart?” Of course. So again, what the hell is their problem?

Unless, Mark Zuckerberg, the head of FB has had some kind of fart suppression surgery and forbids anyone from mentioning farts at FB. Or…..the entire FB offices have “No Farting” signs all over the place. OR….perhaps they’re running out of money and can’t afford air fresheners anymore, and employees at FB have to squeeze their cheeks together the entire day, lest they actually fart and piss off FB executives. Who, as we all know, never fart. Because if they did, I wouldn’t have been censored in the first place.

I have four words for those idiots at Facebook. “Get a freakin’ life!” EVERYBODY FARTS FOR CRIPES SAKE! Animals fart. Maybe even insects. Damn! They even make whoopee cushions for people who want to have fun pretending to fart.

Whoopie cushions may be banned at Facebook. Just a guess.

m

Hey Zuckerberg….here’s a new idea for ya…..

The problem with social media is “social media.” What one person finds offensive, another finds humorous. BUT….one person, or a few, should NOT decide what the rest of us should have access to. That is, as you know, is called censoring. Which in my opinion is wrong. We should all have freedom of choice. Ya don’t wanna read something offensive…..hell….don’t read it for cripes sake. But do not dictate what the rest of us choose to read you jerks.

Why do you think they have those block button on TV’s for parents with kids. Speaking of…..kids….do you actually think they have never heard the word “fart?” Or worse yet. Actually farted.

o

Oops…..damn…where the F**K are the FB censors when ya need them

So, in conclusion, I actually feel somewhat pissed off at Facebook for censoring my blog post link because I used such a despicable word as “fart.” Yet……I feel kind of honored that they paid any attention to what the hell I’m writing about. Kinda like being caught in the middle of a rock and a hard place.

b

Because there’s nothing worse than a dog fart……other than writing the word “fart” on Facebook

I feel honored, yet pissed off, yet amused that in today’s society a giant corporation like Facebook goes into a def one mode because of a fart….or the word fart.

As in that old saying, “Something smells rotten in Denmark. I suspect something smells rotten at Facebook.”

William Shakespeare actually wrote: “Something is rotten in the state of Denmark.”
The quote is used to describe corruption or a situation in which something is very wrong. There’s a reason Marcellus says “the state of Denmark” rather than just Denmark. It’s the idea of the fish is rotting from the head down. In other words, all is not well at the top of the political hierarchy. After Hamlet hears the ghost’s frightening story, the young prince realizes just how rotten things really are in Denmark.

Which begs the following question: Would William Shakespeare have been censored had Facebook been around during his time………

Because I’m sure ol William farted, like the rest of us, which may have prompted him to write about it, post a link about it on Facebook, in prose of course, and have been promptly censored by Facebook.

Just sayin.”

a

And one pissed off note from some guy named Misfit about Facebook…..

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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2 Responses to Forgive me father…for I have sinned. (farted) Censored by Facebook.

  1. katydidknot says:

    Seems like the right response if someone was offended by the word “fart” would be to unfriend you. Maybe there are a lot of parents who don’t want to be forced to explain farting to their kids?

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