The Difference Between Lady Ga Ga’s Body & Miley Cyrus

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Crotch grab = sensual = YES!

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Crotch grab = sensual = NO!

Look folks, I’ve got nothing against watching those music awards shows and seeing Lady Ga Ga half-naked running around all over the stage. But, that said, I kinda draw the ol line when I see a kid, and I use the term “kid” seriously because when I saw those pics of Miley Cyrus attempting to pull a Ga Ga stunt, I said to myself, “WTF.”

First, before I go on, and I want you to know that I debated writing this for a bit until the dust settled, which it has, somewhat, so let’s take a look for comparison’s sake at both Ga Ga’s outfit and that of Cyrus’s.

Lady Ga Ga at the MTV Awards

Lady Ga Ga at the MTV Awards

Ok, you can see by the photos above that Ga Ga is a wholesome bodied woman. Yep…no doubt about it. She’s 26 years old and has a body that most men, if not all, excluding that Corsi jerk I wrote about in yesterday’s blog, would die for. She, without a doubt would make a good pictorial layout for “Playboy Magazine” as well.

Why? Because she looks like a……pay attention here, a WOMAN! Unlike Cyrus, wearing sneakers looking like a cheerleader.

Now, take a gander at these pics of Miley Cyrus and tell me if she falls into the same category. (if you’re between the ages of 12 and 18 you cannot make a judgement here because your brain, like Miley’s, has not fully developed yet into distinguishing between what qualifies as being a full-fledged hot woman and a young girl gone nutso)

Now the photos:

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Cyrus. Who looks like she’s in her teenage underwear and a bit anemic

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Ah yes…this DOES seem to scream out sensual doesn’t it? Or…..OMG! is it Halloween already!

Now after viewing those photos of Ga Ga and Cyrus, tell me I’m off the mark here.

Because I’m NOT!twerking2

Cyrus, at 20, just out of her teens, looks like she’s still in her teens and obviously still has a teenage body to indicate that. She DOES NOT have the body that Ga Ga has to be attempting to be “twerking,” (new word we all have to get used to) all of her twerker stuff all over the place whilst making sexually suggestive gestures that Ga Ga could get away with but that Cyrus could not.

Show me a girl just out of her teens dressing the way Cyrus did on the MTV Awards show who’s dancing somewhere, say like at a regular dance, and I’d be calling the EMT’s figuring she was having a freakin’ seizure or mental breakdown for cripes sake.

On the other hand, show me Lady Ga Ga doing the same sexually suggestive moves that Cyrus did and I’d be holding onto my crotch while drooling.

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Boy am I a freakin’ dinosaur. In my day they called this simulated f**king. NOW it’s called “twerking.” Go figure.

Do ya get my point here folks? Maybe a teenager or a guy just into his 20’s might get all hot and bothered, but anyone over that age is gonna think, “OMG a Mouseketeer gone wild!” Yes, I know she was not a Mouseketeer but was “Hannah Montana” and probably should have stayed Hannah Montana, and dressed, but did not.

So what did Cyrus have to say about running around on stage in that outfit doing weird sexually suggestive stuff while sticking her tongue out. (hmmm…..maybe she WAS having a seizure)

“I don’t pay attention to the negative because I’ve seen this play out so many times. Madonna’s done it. Britney’s done it. Every VMA performance, that’s what you’re looking for, you’re wanting to make history.”

Ok…sure….that explains it all Miley. Monkey see publicity, monkey do publicity.

And we all know Madonna and Britney were both in their 20’s when they did it don’t we?

Um……I think both had really great bodies however. No skin and bone there bunky.

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Recent photo taken at the MisfitWisdom household by my secret hidden video cam

So basically what all this is about is what Cyrus just said. “Making history.’

Which she accomplished.  And got all the publicity she so much wanted. More than all the other news covered by the media that day…..which we all know was less important than Miley Cyrus strutting her adolescent stuff on TV.cyrus1

And when asked about it further said, “You’re thinking about it more than I thought about it when I did it.”

But here’s my favorite line from Cyrus. “I didn’t event think about it, cause that’s just me.”

Really!

That’s just you?  Gawd…..Billy Ray, (Cyrus’ dad) must have been really proud of you strutting your stuff up there. Bet he was thinking that just a few years earlier when you were in diapers, “Hey….I can just picture her half-naked on stage strutting her stuff, doing sexually suggestive motions while sticking her tongue out and getting all her followers hot and bothered.”

Wonder if Billy Ray suggested that she wear a diaper too…..just for old times sake.

“Gawd….(sniff) there’s my little girl, almost all grown up, half-naked on stage and without a diaper…..(sniff)….how cute.”

Nada, nothing, zilch, no way did Cyrus’s performance even so much as twerked any part of my twerkable body parts, which, at my age, are still very much twerkable.

Ga Ga on the other hand always manages to “twerk” my twerkable parts because she is, as I said, a WOMAN! Madonna, although a bit older, also has “twerked” my twerker on a number of occasions.

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Pluck my magic “twerker” Madonna

As does Britney……britney

I guess what I’m attempting to project here is one word……MEAT!  Yes 100% USDA MEAT!  Meat on bones. Meat on performers, namely Madonna and Spears that looks great, feels great, and IS great….to look at….is sensual….and does NOT project immaturity…as in Cyrus’s lack of meat.

Sorry to be crude there, but it was the first thought that came into my mind.

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RUN Assad…..RUN! She just ate a burrito bean salad at Taco Bell!

So, basically Miley Crrus, in my own humble worthless opinion, should have seeked out the USDA approval first before going on stage and attempting to pass off skin and bone in a sexually  suggestive planned performance, so as to make history, but coming off as a just over the line adult not quite ready for sexual innuendo prime time.

As Clara Peller once said in that old “Wendy’s commercial…………..peller

Just sayin.’

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Copyright 2013 MisfitWisdom RLV

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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