A friend of mine recently brought up a valid point. It concerns those warnings you get on a lot of devices like cameras and stuff that you use to take photos with or store information on. You know, the warning that says, “memory full.” Which, always happens at a crucial time when you need to take that one in a lifetime photo of a dog using an ATM machine or some bimbo’s boob popping out of her dress in a bar. “Oops….sorry pal….memory full.”
So much for posting your photos or video on “YouTube” and it going viral. Kinda like would anyone know who Abraham Zapruder was today if he had been filming the JFK Assassination using one of today’s digital cameras and just at that crucial photo opportunity moment that warning came up that said, “Sorry Abe, memory full.”
Not that it would matter, because once the FBI and the CIA got their hands on his video they’d say none of his images proving there was a second assassin was recorded because his camera memory was full.
I don’t get it. For the most part we humans do not have “memory full” warnings in our brains. You’ll notice I said, “most of us.” Those people who do have memory overload in their brains suffer from a condition commonly referred to as “CRS.” (Can’t Remember S**T) Unfortunately they can’t be recharged either.
But that’s just one thing that baffles the mind. Why can’t there be unlimited memory in these devices? I can remember things as far back as two hours ago. Um, sorry, I meant that I can remember things as far back as 60 years ago, so why can’t a device do that too. Do you have any idea how many boob falling out of dresses shots I’ve missed because of that “memory full” warning.
At least two. (I don’t get out enough to cash in on the boob falling out of dresses action)
Another thing that really pisses me off. Electronic bank transfers and deposits.
The key word here folks is, “electronic.” Meaning that, I assume, no actual human beings are involved in these transactions other than you pushing a button, and maybe, just maybe, one other person pushing a button at the other end. That’s debatable.
Example number one: I go to my local gas station. Insert my debit card into the gas pump. Pump the amount of gas I desire, and “shazam!…..sale complete. Now I drive back home and check my bank statement and, once again, Shazam!…..there’s the transaction recorded and a notification that the bank has already processed that transaction. Total elapsed time…….20 minutes. Ya gotta love technology and instant transactions stuff.
(NOTE) EBT cards are NOT debit cards and will not work at gas pumps or other establishments for items other than food. Basically meaning you will not get an instantaneous transaction nor a stimulating experience.
EXCEPT…………………when technology really sucks.
Example number two: I request cash from a site on the Internet that pays me for my worthless opinions. How? I sit at my computer, push a button that says, “withdraw” and send cash to “PayPal” and Shazam!…….done.
Sooooo do I get that cash instantaneously? Of course not. How long does it take. Oh……just 3 to four days……….”electronically.” WTF! The key word again here folks is, “electronically.” Three to four days “electronically.”
WTF! (again) What happens “electronically” that takes 3 to 4 days? Does someone turn off a switch at night that shuts down all electronics? Do electronic payments only work between the hours of 9 and 5? Are there like hold ups if electronic payments have to cross state lines? Or is it the same as in those digital devices, like, “Oops, sorry, our electronic transfer money to your account memory is full…..try again tomorrow bozo, or just wait a few days, we’ll get it to you eventually.”
My theory is the distance. Yep….as lame as it seems, it’s gotta be distance. The farther you are away from your bank, the longer electronic transfers or deposits take.
For instance. When I was pumping gas at that gas station using my debit card I was only one and a half miles from my bank. So the electronic “grab this guys money cause he’s buying gas using his debit card” mode went into effect immediately. THEN, because I was only three miles from my house, and computer, it registered there too. See….that’s how it works.
So if you request or transfer money to your account from one end of the country to the other, then it takes three to four days. HEY! What else could it be? Seems quite logical to me.
Except in the case of the IRS when they attach your bank funds and seize all of your money. That’s instantaneous. Most likely because they have travelling IRS vans that park outside of your house, seize your money, and before they push the button to collect from your bank account, they drive to that bank’s location, and THEN push the button. Lest they have to wait three to four days like the rest of us.
Which brings us back to the “memory full” problem.
Obviously the only solution to that is to not let your brain, or your digital device, overload to the point of being full of memory.
When people tell you to remember things, sort out the unimportant ones, just forget them, and you’ll never go into a “memory full” mode.
On your digital devices, use the same method. Only save important stuff. Dump useless information like bank account codes, passwords, maps, stock market transactions and save the memory for that good stuff. Boob shots, and, for the women, butt shots. Once in a lifetime opportunities. Unlike those other things that you can access anytime. Besides, doesn’t your bank, stock broker and the NSA save all that stuff for you anyhow. Which is why their digital devices are always in “memory full” mode.
Now in conclusion, I for one do not worry about anything I own going into “memory full” warnings. Only because I’m too freakin’ old to want to remember anything beyond yesterday anyhow and I don’t frequent anyplace where I might catch a glimpse of an escaped boob or two. Except for the local senior center, and if a boob escaped there, every male would be running for the door lest they be traumatized for life.
And the only cash transfers that I do for the most part is from my hand to my other half’s hands.
Which is instantaneous.
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