E. T….Call Home…..or just send a text message. Unless You’re A Rat From Mars.

I knew It!  I knew it all along. We were looking for aliens from another planet in the wrong places.  Yep.  It’s true.  We should not be looking into outer space for the arrival of little green creatures with one eye.  They’re already here!

Yes, I’m aware of the story going viral on the Internet of a rat on Mars. (not the candy company) Although, a rat in a company that makes candy would seem more logical than a rat on Mars. HEY! If you were a rat with a sweet tooth, as we all know rats have, would you wanna be on Mars with no sweets or at a place where they make candy? Just sayin.’

If you missed the “Rat-Mars” story you can search for it on the Internet, or go to the site I found it on, “The Christian Science Monitor,” because I think they “monitor” this sort of stuff about rats and Mars along with possibly attempting to convert rats to Christians. My guess anyhow. Otherwise why would Christians at the Christian Science Monitor give a rats ass.

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Me thinkith NASA pullith the woolith overith our eyes…or……the rat was a space rocket to Mars stowaway.

But, Mars rats aside, we may have our own rat aliens right here on Earth.  Not necessarily resembling rats.

According to Paul Davies, an award-winning Arizona State University physicist, variant life forms, most of which are tiny microbes are living with us right at this very moment.  One of them could be sitting right next to you now as you’re reading this blog.  Better make another pot of coffee for your guest.

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Possible photograph of tiny alien microbes

I bet you’re all thinking that I’m making this stuff up.  WRONG!  You really can’t make this stuff up.  It’s for real.  Especially when it appears in a mainstream newspaper and written by an Associated Press reporter and apparently researched by this noted physicist.  Pay attention here!

Mr. Davies states that these aliens are in the form of chemical-eating bacteria which dwell deep in the ocean along with organisms that thrive in boiling-hot springs.  Well,…..that took a load off my mind immediately because I do not hang around deep oceans, (I can’t swim) and for the most part, I do not ever recall running into a boiling-hot spring in my daily travels.  So I thought of myself as being fairly safe from any alien that may might be lurking in any of those areas.

With the exception of the hot spring bath I built in my backyard for my cats.

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Oops…………

So I continued to read the news article.

Mr. Davies called for alien-hunting scientists to look to their own backyards in the search for extraterrestrial life.  Now what the heck does that mean?  Should I be outside in my backyard looking under my landscaping bricks?  Peering into my charcoal grill to see if alien life has found a temporary sanctuary.  (I did find a stray mouse living in my grill last year.  I should have paid closer attention to it. Could have been one of those pesky alien’s in disguise)

I’m really beginning to get paranoid here folks.  It’s bad enough I have to worry about salt police, smoking police, seatbelt police, cellphone police, and police watching other police, policing the police that they’re policing.  Now I have to worry about aliens who may already be among us.  Well, I kinda suspected some of them were already here when Sarah Palin ran for Vice President a few years ago. (sorry, I just couldn’t help myself)

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OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyhow, I’ve decided to spend the day alien proofing my house.  I started in the bathroom because I’ve always suspected that if an alien were to somehow be a tiny being, and of course an excellent swimmer able to hold their breath for long periods of time, they might actually use the bathroom toilet as an entrance point.  Seems perfectly logical to me.  The well-known physicist did say they could be in the form of tiny microbes.

So that’s my project for today.  If all of you were smart, you’d be doing the same thing.  If this had been printed in the National Enquirer” I might have simply brushed it off.  But it was in a mainstream newspaper.  WAIT!  Didn’t the National Enquirer receive recognition as a mainstream newspaper for breaking the story that John Edwards fathered a child other than his wife’s awhile back?  Hmmmm, then I guess I “would” believe it if it had been in the National Enquirer.  (sigh)

OK, laugh if you want too.  But when I eventually find a tiny microbe living in my bathroom toilet and it turns out to be an alien, who’ll have the last laugh when I make the front page of the National Enquirer.

I can see it now. “Retired Senior Citizen Finds Aliens Living In His Bathroom Toilet.”mars

Well, have a nice day everyone.  It’s time for my anxiety medication.

I’m really “flushed” worrying about all this alien stuff.

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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