Watching Reality Shows Can Be Hazardous To Your Health

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It was only yesterday that I wrote about reality shows, mentioning that Fox Network has introduced a new show where employees vote on which one of their co-workers deserved to be fired. Obviously a show right up there on my “to view” list.

NOT!

No sooner had I posted that story when out of the wilds of York, Pennsylvania comes the tale of a couple who got into an argument and proceeded to stab each other.

Sooooo, What’s this got to do with reality shows you ask?

EVERYTHING!!!!!

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Makes complete sense to me

They got into an argument over watching “American Idol” and who each thought should have been the ultimate winner on the show. Which, they obviously calmly disagreed on…..until……as most of us do when arguing in a calm manner with our spouses, reach for a kitchen knife and proceeded to stab one another….in a calm manner of course.

As the “York Dispatch” reported, one of them reached for the knife first and stabbed the other, then somehow the other grabbed the same knife and stabbed the other one back. The equivalent of getting a so-called twofer deal.idol

What may have contributed to this disagreement was the fact that both had been drinking while watching the show. You know how booze tends to make people appearing on “American Idol” seem a lot more talented then they really are. Actually, booze makes everybody seem talented. Ever been to a karaoke bar? I rest my case.

So, 57 year-old Gregory Stambaugh and 48 year-old Elaine Harrelson have both been charged with being stupid. Um, no….that’s not right. Both have been charged with “Reality Show Stupidnitis.” Nope….that’s not right either, but both of those should be. They were charged with being idiots. Sorry, not right either. Let’s see…oh yeah, they were actually charged with abusing a kitchen knife. Sorry again……here’s the real charges.

They were both charged with assault. Should have been assault and battery but no batteries were involved. Just a kitchen knife.salt

So who were the two “American Idolists” they disagreed about?  They were Candice Glover and Kree Harrison. Glover was the ultimate winner. Stambaugh and Harrelson the ultimate losers.

So ya see, watching reality shows CAN be dangerous to your health. Which is yet another reason why I don’t watch reality shows.

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However…..If I could convince my bank to go along with this idea, I REALLY might get into reality shows.

Um…..with the exception of watching a Boston Red Sox baseball game. And that’s enough to make anyone, including me, lose it.

For instance:

(Misfit) “Why in the freakin’ hell are they leavin’ that #$#%#! pitcher in for cripes sake!!!”

(Ms. Misfit) “Oh calm down dear, he’s only given up 8 runs and he’s got two outs already.”

(Misfit) “Whaddya nuts! He’s giving the $#%#$!@!~ game away the stinkin’ bum!”

(Ms. Misfit) “Hey….don’t call me nuts. You’re the one who’s losing it ya jerk!”

(Misfit) “WHAT! Who ya callin’ a jerk! Are ya blind or something!”

(Ms. Misfit) “BLIND!!!! Keep it up and you’ll see how blind I am. I’ll whack the damn bejesus outa you with this crocheting needle!”

(Misfit) “Oh yeah! Oh yeah!” Just try it and I’ll whack ya with the TV remote!”

(TV Announcer) “And the Sox have miraculously scored 18 runs in the 9th inning with two outs……can you believe it!!!!”

(Misfit) “Love you honeeeee.”

(Ms. Misfit) “Me too dear.”

Hence, violence with a crocheting needle and a TV remote avoided from watching a reality TV show.

Otherwise I’d be writing this blog about a blogger, (me) and his companion, (Ms. Misfit) being charged with assault and battery with a TV remote and crocheting needle.

Just sayin.’yankees

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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