Iceland Ices Internet Indecent Images….Or, As We Refer To It In The U.S……Porno.

iceland 2

No wonder it’s so cold in Iceland. No access to Internet porno to warm your bones up. Well, at least if a new plan proposal by Interior Minister Ogmunder Jonasson is approved.

Let me stop right here for a sec.

I don’t know what the deal is with people’s names in Iceland, but doesn’t anybody up there have a name that isn’t like using all the letters in the alphabet that no one else in the world uses. Except Norway, Sweden and Denmark.

For instance. Here are the names I’ll be using in this story. Besides Og…. whatever that I just mentioned earlier.

Halla Gunnarsdottir, Birgitta Jonsdottir and Gail Dines. Um, wait. How did Gail Dines get in there without any gunnarrsdottirogmunders in her name. Hmmm, must be a transplant.

Ok…on with the icy story.

As I mentioned, if you were paying attention, Iceland wants to ban pornography from the Internet lest little kiddies and innocent animals access the Internet and come across other types of animals, (naked humans) doing what actual animals do all the time when they’re out roaming in the woods with no clothes on. (graphic example pictured below…….which, if accessed on the Internet by children in Iceland could cause trauma)

NOTE: MisfitWisdom assumes no responsibility for the indecent actions of animals involved in any pornographic activity. Blame Mother Nature.

What happens in the forest, stays in the forest.

What happens in the forest, stays in the forest.

Halla Gunnarsdottii, political advisor to that other guy with the long name, Ogmundur, says, “When a 12-year-old types “porn” into “Google,” he or she is not going to find photos of naked women out on a country field, (like those animals pictured) but very hardcore and brutal violence.”

I personally searched the Internet by keying in “porno” but could not find any animals involved in hardcore and brutal violence. Which most likely means Ms. Gunnarsdottii is talking about humans. Glad we cleared that point up.

Strangely enough, pornography has been banned in Iceland for decades. Apparently because it’s too damn cold up there for anybody to run around naked, let alone get involved in porno stuff and freeze their doo dads off. BUT, magazines such as Playboy and Penthouse are on sale in book stores with more hardcore material available at a handful of sex shops. Adult channels are also available as part of digital TV packages. (source AP News who enlightened me on the goings on in Iceland)

So let me see if I understand this correctly. They want to block porno from the Internet so little children won’t have access, BUT, any kid could walk into a bookstore and lift a copy of Playboy or Penthouse. Just like I did as a kid. Oops.

(I confessed to ripping off Playboy’s to Father Guido Sarducci every week when he appeared on the Smothers Brother’s TV show)

You don’t actually think I was gonna confess ripping off Playboy Magazines to a real priest do ya. Cripes, I’d be in the confessional every week.

Misfitto....Misfitto...youa liea to me....shamea on you

Misfitto….Misfitto…youa liea to me….shamea on you

Iceland’s government insists it is not setting out to sweep away racy magazines, (porno types and not the ones NASCAR puts out) or censor sex. The ban would define pornography as material with violent or degrading content.

Kinda like if a couple are naked and get into an argument and the woman calls the guy a ratfink, which is very degrading, and he in turn, being very sensitive, violently sobs hysterically.

Australia announced it would introduce an Internet filtering system, (not to be confused with the Brita water filtering system) a few years ago that would block websites containing offensive material such as child pornography, sexual violence, terrorist content and bestiality.  BUT, after an outcry, (most likely from various beasts in the forest, mostly kangaroos) the government abandoned the plan last year.

(kangaroos outnumber people in Australia)

Why kangaroos outnumber people in Australia

Why kangaroos outnumber people in Australia

Denmark, another country with weird last names for people, tried the same blocking attempt last year, which failed because it blocked access to Facebook and Google. And we all know the essence of life is access to Facebook and Google.

Ragnheidur Arnarsdottier, (gesuncheit) thinks it’s a good idea but, “It’s difficult to fight technology.” Unless you’re a professional boxer. My guess anyhow.

Now folks, a bit of trivia. There are 320,000 people living in Iceland. Most are frozen solid. So wouldn’t you think watching a bit of porno would warm them up? Works for me because my other half keeps the thermostat set at 61 degrees in the winter.

Now for our last person who I mentioned earlier with sort of a normal name. Gail Dines. She says, “This is a country with courage.”

Which means, I guess, you really have to be nuts and have a lot of courage to live in Iceland and freeze your butt off. Or have a lot of body hair.

She goes on to say, “Iceland is going to be the first country with guts to stand up to these predatory bullies from L.A. (in the porn industry) It’s going to take one country to show that this is possible.”

NOTE: Never date a woman from Iceland

NOTE: Never date a woman from Iceland

Now back to the alphabet names. Brigitta Jonsdottir, a prominent advocate of online freedom says, “I can say with absolute certainty that this will not happen.”

Soooooo. Figuratively speaking, the lines are drawn in the ice.

The other person with the same part of a last name ending in “dottir,” Halla Gunnarsdottir finished with, “I think we should be able to discuss the Internet with more depth,without just shouting censorship on the one hand and laissez-faire, (not the name of a female porno star) on the other hand.”

For those of you definition freaks:

Laissez-faire (Listeni/ˌlɛsˈfɛər/, French: [lɛsefɛʁ] ( listen)) (or sometimes laisser-faire) is an economic environment in which transactions between private parties are free from tariffs, government subsidies, and enforced monopolies, with only enough government regulations sufficient to protect property rights against theft and aggression. The phrase laissez-faire is French and literally means “let [them] do”, but it broadly implies “let it be,” “let them do as they will,” or “leave it alone”. Scholars generally believe a laissez-faire state or a completely free market has never existed.[1][2]

In other words, “let them eat cake.” Kinda.let-them-eat-cake-279x350

So that’s the big news out of Iceland…..other than a volcano erupting, which Iceland is noted for. Right now, with porno on the brain, they’re more concerned about other things erupting. If you get the point here.

But....you have to be careful around both.

But….you have to be careful around both.

Gotta end this now. I’m sooooooo cold from even thinking about Iceland.

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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