Yep….all these years when John Denver’s song, “Rocky Mountain High” was playing on the radio, little did I know that years from then, (1973) it would most likely become the theme song for marijuana sales in Colorado and Washington.
Voters in both states approved the legalization of marijuana in small amounts, much to the dismay of the Federal government, who, like to keep tabs on who in the hell is smoking weed. Besides Cheech and Chong.
It’s like this. Although marijuana is now legal in those states, it’s still against the law to have it in other states. Legalizing it in Washington and Colorado creates somewhat of a problem for the Feds. Like you can stand on the state line of either of those two states, say like if you’re in Colorado, where four states actually meet, and you’re standing on the Colorado line blowing pot smoke into the other three states that meet there, Arizona, New Mexico and Utah, the Feds can’t nail ya. As long as you’re still smoking in Colorado.
Washington residents smoking pot wouldn’t have the same luxury of blowing smoke into three other states at the same time. Considering Oregon borders on one side, Idaho the other, the Pacific ocean on the other and to the North, Canada. So in essence Colorado pot smokers get to have more fun taunting the Feds.
“Hey G-Man…..look….ahm smokin’ three joints at the same time, my girlfriend is holdin’ a flowerpot full of marijuana plants and my dog is totally stoned….ha, ha, ha, ha…..whatcha gonna do about it….huh!”
“Ok….punk…..we can’t touch you while you’re standing in Colorado, but if you so much as cross any of those other state lines your ass is grass!”
“GRASS!! GRASS!! OMG! A Fed guy just made a joke. GRASS!!! Hey Dick Tracy, that’s what we’re smokin here!”
Now I personally do not smoke grass. I have enough problems cutting my lawn as it is and hauling grass clippings off to the dump as it is. I sure as hell don’t wanna smoke it too. Um….wait a sec. Oh, sorry, that’s NOT the kinda grass we’re talkin’ about here. Damn! So much for my plan of shipping my grass clippings to Washington and Colorado and making a fortune.
Anyhow, at the present time I do not smoke grass, or as some of you call it, “pot” or “weed,” or whatever. Not that I haven’t in the past mind you. Of course that was in my younger days when I could actually smoke it and remain standing. At my age if I attempted to smoke it now I’d be useless to anyone for several days. It’s bad enough as it is being old and useless, but to be old and useless and “stoned” is a bit much.
My own experiment with pot took place back in the 60’s. You know, free love, “Woodstock,” rock and roll, Jimi Hendrix, and all that psychedelic music. But, I came upon marijuana very innocently, rather than actually seeking out a weed salesperson. Usually a Fuller Brush Salesmen or Avon ladies wanting to supplement their income while going from door to door.
I worked at a small radio station which was situated along a river on one side and some railroad tracks on the other. On the other side of the RR tracks stood a fertilizer company. During news breaks I would stand outside the station just grabbing a quick smoke, (regular cigarettes) and enjoying the summer air. I happened to notice some strange-looking plants growing alongside the RR tracks and decided to check them out.
YES! Marijuana plants growing wildly. PIG HEAVEN!!!
So, you ask yourelves….just how did those plants get there? I’ll tell ya how. The fertilizer company harvested Midwest cow poop,, (better known as “cow flaps” or in poorer areas of the country, “Frisbees) loaded their harvest onto RR boxcars, transported it to the East coast to the fertilizer processing plant next to the radio station, and unloaded the boxcars. Workers, I assume wearing cow poop goggles and nose covers swept out those empty boxcars of the remaining miniscule cow poop residue which landed on the ground next to the RR tracks and radio station, which in turn took seed and grew into very healthy marijuana plants. Which explains why you see my car parked next to them…….easy harvesting.
And…..because those Midwest cows ate anything that grew in their fields, including marijuana and the accompanying seeds, their cow poop residue, when swept out of those boxcars, grew into really great marijuana plants, which, I, rather than let them go to waste, harvested and promptly, upon drying the plants out, smoked and really enjoyed the 60’s.
Not to mention the fact that now, with the legalization of pot in Colorado, every time “Rocky Mountain High” is now played on the radio, I’ll think of those wonderful days of harvesting marijuana plants between breaks at that radio station. And finally having an answer to the question, “Why are cows always content and smiling?”
Personally I commend those voters in Washington and Colorado for approving that measure. It’s about time the Feds get out of the stone age and realize that pot is never going to go away. That it’s been around for ages. Legalizing it and taxing sales on marijuana will bring more money into state coffers. AND….the Feds can devote their time to actually nailing real criminals.
Like Wyle E. Coyote,” for speeding, property destruction and threatening the life of that poor defenseless bird.
Meanwhile the milk industry in Washington and Colorado could also benefit from legalizing marijuana with new and improved ads….like…..
“Hey Man….Got Milk…….and Pot.”
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