Ok, it’s over and done. Yet, there are a few areas which I would like to reflect upon today. First and foremost, the national idiot. Or as I like to refer to him as, “The National Court Jester.” None other than Donald Trump. Who always has a knack for getting himself media coverage by proving to the rest of us normal people that government funding for loony bins should continue if only to have a room for him when someone finally straps a straight jacket on this guy and hauls his butt off to a padded room.
The “Donald” was soooo upset over Obama winning the election that he went on a “Twitter” rant which most likely resulted in his computer screen being covered with specks of saliva and pieces of his hair stuck to the screen. Not a pretty sight.
Some of his rants just in case you missed them:
“our nation is a once great nation divided” and “the world is laughing at us.” He encouraged a “revolution in this country.”
I checked the world and as far as I can determine I couldn’t find anyone in the “world” laughing at us. Unless what Donald meant by the “world” was “his” world, which, as we all know, is in his head. A rather small world I might add.
Yet another tweet:
Trump began tweeting before the election was called that it was “a total sham and a travesty.” After news outlets projected that Obama won the election, Trump tweeted, “Well, back to the drawing board!”
Considering that Donald is only allowed to use crayons on his drawing board may explain why he’s so upset. He really needs to get into the 21st century and use Photoshop or something. Crayons are kinda out. Then again, if he does eventually wind up in a padded cell, crayons may be all that they allow him to have.
NBC’s Brian Williams responded to Trump’s insane tweets by saying: “You are an embarrassment to all birds and birdwatchers who tweet on a daily basis and belong to the Audubon Society”
Um….WAIT! No, that’s not what Williams said. Sorry…..I got it wrong. THIS is what Williams said: Williams showed some of Trump’s tweets on air, saying he had “driven well past the last exit to relevance and veered into something closer to irresponsible.”
YES….Donald has missed the last exit to Brooklyn, which was in the small town of “Relevance” and now has to go over the Verrazzano Bridge, turn back and get off the correct exit, which will take him to the nearest place where he can commit himself.
DO IT NOW DONALD BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE!!!!
Note to Donald: It’s not that bad at the funny farm. (watch video)
You may have missed this one, but it’s worth mentioning. A major ballot question was voted upon in Los Angeles and won approval. One giant step for mankind, or condom manufacturers. Yep….in Los Angeles voters approved a measure requiring porn performers to wear condoms while filming sex scenes.
Hmmmm. Wonder how in the hell they ran ads for THAT measure?
“Hi. I’m Pussy Galore. (stole that name from an old James Bond movie) As you all know a very important ballot question is on the ballot that would require all porn performers to wear condoms. We here in the porn industry are against this measure. Our main opposition is that condoms cost a helluva lot of money and we really don’t make much money filming screwing scenes as it is. Other than the pleasure factor, there really aren’t many perks, other than watching various male perks rise. Condoms would only make “those” perks less perky. We say, vote no to condoms on our perks.” (paid for by the Hollywood and Vine Hookers Association………Geena Vagina President)
But of course, you have to give equal time to the condom supporters. (This would be the perfect time to insert the line that condom supporters are men with erections, but I didn’t want to appear shallow. Um..oops…too late)
“Hi folks. I’m with an organization called, “Protect Everyone Now….Institute Safeties.” (PENIS for short) We believe that all men’s members should be protected during the filming of sordid sex scenes so as to protect voluptuous women in these sex scenes with big boobs, cleavage and throbbing body parts from having to actually see a real live honest to goodness male body part completely naked. Vote yes to being propositioned…..um…..I mean, vote yes to “Proposition 69” on November 6th. (paid for by the “Trojan” condom company whose sole purpose in supporting this measure is making money off selling condoms)
And to think, you all thought that legalization of marijuana on some state ballots was more important.
Also I think a round of applause should go out to fellow blogger and author Kimberly A. Johnson who pushed the “Rock the Slut Vote” and urged all women, sluts or not, to vote. Made me almost wanna be a slut myself just so I could join the movement. Ah, maybe in my next life.
Bravo to Diane Sawyer for a lighthearted moment which set the “Twitterdom” in a tizzy because they all assumed she was dipping into the ol wine bottle during the night’s election coverage. Geez….weren’t we all. (hic)
And, for all bloggers, including myself, who think blogging is our most important calling in life….other than when nature calls, my thanks to cartoonist Gary Trudeau, (Doonesbury) for yesterday’s strip. (below-click on to enlarge))
One final note: With Florida in mind. HEY! U.S. government! Get a freakin’ clue here! Tell the no brainer states like Florida and any other state that can’t get their damn voting act together that they all had their chances to get it right, (236 years) and now it’s time to step in, slap them suckers across the head with a wet salami, and take over the voting process. Some of us think the government is tooooo big, but in this case, it’s NOT big enough. The Federal government needs to pass legislation to make all voting in all states the same. NATIONWIDE! IT DOESN’T TAKE A ROCKET SCIENTIST TO FIGURE THAT ONE OUT!
Then again…..maybe it’s time to call in Wernher von Braun.
I rest my case………
of condoms……jusssssst in case I have an opportunity to star in a LA porno movie…….can’t be too prepared ya know.
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