Some Things I Just Can’t Figure Out. OR: How many times can I use “WTF” in today’s blog.

In the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy, I had an awful lot of time to re calculate my pea sized brain into the, what I call, “The WTF” mode. Meaning basically, “WTF.”

Like New York city is surrounded by two rivers, none of them named “Joan,” plus the Atlantic ocean is around there somewhere as well. Like out on Long Island Sound. So the city itself is what you might call an island. East River on one side and the Hudson River on the other. Which led me to say to myself, “WTF!” Why would anyone in their right mind build a huge city on an island surrounded by two rivers knowing that if a giant wave came along, parts of the city would be under freakin’ water. Like the subways for instance.

Any chance of getting flooded? NAH….

Do ya suppose that’s why the Indians sold it to us for $24 bucks in the first place?

“Chief, wait till ya hear this one.”

“What is it Conman Bear.”

“I just sold a bunch of immigrants that swampy useless piece of land for $24 bucks which they paid for with beads and trinkets. What a bunch of saps.”

“Good deal Conman Bear. You didn’t tell them jerks that when big storm come down from sky and rain God bring big water that land will be underwater did ya?”

“Hell no. I didn’t fall off of my horse yesterday ya know.”

“Pssst…..Sitting Cow…after this deal we’ll give the one in the funny hat,cape and silly pants an Indian name. How about, “S**t for Brains.”

So these immigrants went ahead and built all sorts of things on this piece of land knowing full well that water surrounded both sides of the island. Did any of them ever give much thought to what would happen when the big flood came? No! Did any of them bother to watch the movie, “The Day After Tomorrow?” NO! Are any of them, now that New York is flooded, going to take those Indians to court and sue for their beads and trinkets back? NO! So, there’s my “WTF” moment.

I sure as hell won’t be in New York…

Now, my next one. Isn’t it absolutely amazing how we’ve advanced as humans with all this great technology today. Been to the moon. Landed a “Mars Rover” on Mars. Can fly drone planes all over the place and zoom on some unsuspecting terrorist guy and zap the hell outta him. Developed cars that can just about do anything except have sex with us……yet. Although I could tell you a few stories about old manual stick shifts and um…er…neverrrr mind.

Anyhow, my next “WTF” moment occurred when for the gazillionth time I lost my electricity during the hurricane. Obviously I said to myself, “WTF.” Only because you would think that the utility companies would get a freakin’ clue that if, A: a tree falls on a wire, that B: you either take preventive action and get rid of the damn tree, or C: you have an amazing brainstorm of an idea and say to yourself, “Duh….why don’t we bury all electrical wires under the ground!”

The offending tree which attacked power lines just down from MisfitWisdom headquarters. A bit scenic I might add, what with the Autumn colors and all.

Part of a telephone pole which imbedded itself into my front lawn causing our power outage. As well as upsetting numerous squirrels residing in the tree next to the downed line.

The answer to that question is obvious. Because it would cost them greedy utility companies millions of dollars to take existing lines and bury them underground whereas and forsooth, it cost them less to bring in out-of-state workers to repair the damage from storms. My guess anyhow. If they could harness the power of groundhogs and make those little suckers dig holes, (cheap labor) we could all have our utility lines underground in no time.

California, ahead of its time, experiments with cheap labor.

I’m personally doing my part by training the one groundhog I have in my yard to prepare for active duty as soon as I can get permission from my utility company to just lay down the wires on the ground and I, along with my little friend, do the rest. How simple is that!

Ok Misfit……where da ya want that trench?

My next “WTF” question is why is it that when a storm is coming all of a sudden everyone runs out and buys milk and bread?  I’m tellin’ ya, the shelves were bare. No milk and bread. You’d think other stuff would be in demand. Like toilet paper for instance. Eat all that bread and drink all of that milk, at some point you’re gonna hafta poop. And, with all that spare time people are gonna have with no electricity, you’d think condoms would be selling off the wall. I mean, ya don’t need to be a rocket scientist to figure out that if there’s nothing to do pass the time you might as well boh-de-oh-doe.

It’ll be interesting to see how many new kids are born come next August. AND….how many of them are named “Sandy” or, in the case of boys, “Sandar,” or just plain “San.”

(marking on my calendar to check birth stats for next August)

Damn you huricane Sandy….oh yeah..and Johnny freakin’ Cash too.

Finally. Has anybody noticed that during this election the main hype for many politicians is to cut the size of bigggggg government. You know, spending, spending, spending, entitlement programs, Medicare, Medicaid, etc, etc, etc, and let those stinkin’ needy lowdown slug people fend for themselves.

EXCEPT!  When a major disaster occurs. Then it’s, you guessed it, the Federal government to the rescue.

“Hey, we don’t want the government on our damn backs……um, do ya think we could get some government help here….our house is under water and we’re outta food.”

Um……..can anybody say “FEMA?”  Tea Potty……small govenment advocates…….anybody?

Prime example. N.J. Governor Chris Christie meeting with President Obama and praising him for promising federal disaster relief aid to his state. Um, just a few weeks ago wasn’t he calling the pres the worst ever. WTF!

So there ya have it my little friends. All my most recent “WTF” moments. I suspect with storm damage and polling places in question I will have more “WTF” moments next week after the election.

But, right now I have more important things to attend to.

Like, deleting the 500 plus e-mails that accumulated on my computer while the power was out. And, while having “no electricity” and listening to a “battery-powered” radio, trying to figure out the logic behind my utility company telling me to go “online” if I wanted to report an outage. DUH!

Or…..”WTF!”

(DONATE) The MisfitWisdom PayPal donate link, which did indeed survive Hurricane Sandy, much to the dismay of many of you who just wish it would go away, is posted below. If it is not highlighted, (blue) it may be due to the fact that although it did survive the hurricane, the high winds did take the blue paint off of the link and it is now black. In that case, simply copy and paste the link into your browser to get to the PayPal site. Those of you who still have no electricity, just ignore this message because if you have no electricity you’re obviously not reading this. WTF!

Donations since January 2009 AD……..( 1 )

https://www.paypal.com/cgi-bin/webscr?cmd=_s-xclick&hosted_button_id=9Q2GTE5CL84RU

Copyright 2012 MisfitWisdom

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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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