Why Job Interviews Suck………….and how you can make it fun…..if there were actually any jobs to be interviewed for.

Exactly what I do each day before writing this stuff

Yet another article about stuff that makes one wonder why anyone, including me, writes articles on stuff that is full of information about stupid stuff that most of us already know. In this case, why, when you apply for a job, if there were actually any jobs to be interviewed for, they ask those stupid questions, like, “Do you think Adolf Hitler was a pervert?”

Not that they’d actually ask that question, but ya never know.

Donna Fuscaldo, (no idea who she is but she wrote this article about job interviews for Yahoo) says that there is a reason that oddball questions are asked on employment applications.

My guess is that oddball executives who make up those stupid questions have nothing better to do with their time and are bored out of their gourds.

“Interviewers are trying to get behind the facade and learn who the person really is,” says Pamela Skillings, co-founder of a job coaching firm Skillful Communications. “Can this person think on his or her feet.”

Personally I have no problems thinking on my feet or sitting on my butt. Although I find it a lot easier to write these blogs sitting down, as typing while standing on my feet is somewhat difficult. No brainer as far as I’m concerned. So, if someone asked me on a job application if I’d rather stand or sit while working, obviously I’d say, “sit.”  Unless of course I were applying for a job as a NASCAR race driver. On the other hand, if I were applying for a job as a porno star I’d have to opt for laying down.

Examples of some of the stupid questions on job applications or interviews range from, “if you could be any animal, what would you be?”

This has meaning to an interviewer because if you answered something like, “I’d like to be a sloth,” it might appear that you want to just lie around all day doing nothing.  On the other hand, or foot, if you said something like, “I’d like to be a vulture, this might indicate that you may be a good fit for the employer providing it’s a company that specializes in bill collections.  Ya just gotta know how to pitch the animal thing during an interview.

P.S……. NEVER say that you’d like to be a rabbit when answering that question. You all know what rabbits like to do and this could be perceived by a job interviewer that you have sex on your mind all of the time. Or, have a secret fetish for lettuce and carrots.

Another question that pops up a lot is, “If you could possess any superhero powers what would it be.  For me, that was an easy one. X-ray vision……only because I do have sex on my mind all of the time. HEY….don’t all men?

Of course I wouldn’t tell the interviewer that. I’d simply say I’d want to have X-ray vision so that I could see through those scratch off lottery tickets and determine which one was a winner.

I think my biggest complaint when applying for a job is when they ask you if you had any experience.  How the hell do ya get any experience if you haven’t done the job? Yeah, I know…..that’s what schools are for.  But, that’s not really gaining experience on the job as far as I’m concerned.

And how did the very first guy who invented the “job” get experience in the first place? I’ll tell ya how.  He did it by trial and error. Which raises the question…..how did the guy who invented the electric chair know that it would work? Bet that first guy that applied for the job as a tester got hired with no experience.

“Soooooo Mr. Pondowski, what exactly are my job duties?”

“Well, just go over there, sit in that chair, and relax.”

“REALLY!!!  THAT’S IT?  Wow…um…..is there a benefit package that you’re offering.?

“Yep….a realllly good life insurance policy.”

The next time you go for a job and fill out one of those silly applications, stop for a moment, and think about how bad you really want that job. If you have kind of a half-hearted feeling about working for the company, have some fun and fill out the application with a bunch of stupid answers.  Might give them a clue as to just how stupid their application process is.

You know the old line, for starters, on an application where it says, “sex.” Just put down in the box, “yes.”  Drives them nuts.

On the other hand, you just might get hired. Just make sure thye do not manufacture electric chairs.


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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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1 Response to Why Job Interviews Suck………….and how you can make it fun…..if there were actually any jobs to be interviewed for.

  1. Stacey Rodino says:

    when doing job interviews, you should always project great self-confidence.:

    My own, personal website

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