Now personally I could care less about Kim Jong-un. Only because he’s never read any of my blogs nor does he allow anyone, I assume, to read them in North Korea. This really ticks me off because I’ve always said that the only reason those people in North Korea are always so glum looking and are continually trying to provoke people into some sort of confrontation is that they have absolutely no sense of humor.
It’s like an entire nation of Mitt Romneys.
Hey Kim! Lighten up will ya!
However, there may be hope yet for “un” which I like to call him for short. Not that he’s short, (gotta clarify that or before ya know it they’ll be trying to provoke me into some sort of confrontation) but that he’s showing some signs of life under that plain-looking outfit he wears and that awful looking hair cut. (Donald Trump still has Kim beat by a New York mile)
Most notably, the fact that some North Korean woman are now sporting mini skirts. Yes, contrary to opinion all of these years, North Korean woman DO have legs. Which may have been the one reason Kim has lightened up a bit and told women it was ok to wear mini skirts. I personally think he’s a leg man myself. Although, had I been in Kim’s shoes, (size 7 1/2 I think) I would have gone with the cleavage angle. Ya can’t really dislike a North Korean woman who has cleavage.
Not only that, but recently it was announced that Mickey Mouse appeared on stage in a show in North Korea and that Kim kinda likes Sylvester Stallone as Rocky Balboa because it was announced that he was watching some of Sly’s movies. Right on Kimo!
“Comrade Kim. How do you like watching Comrade Mouse cartoons?”
“Just fine Comrade Xing. However, I think Comrade Mouse really needs to dress more conservatively while appearing here in North Korea.”
“How so Comrade Kim?”
“We here in the Republic of North Korea feel that one’s tail should not be exposed nor should bright colors be a part of our society. Perhaps a drab olive for Comrade Mouse and ears that are pinned back.”
Geez….it’s a good think Kim hasn’t seen Donald Duck without pants.
There’s also been a lot of buzz about Kim’s association with a mystery woman that he’s been seen with. Nobody seems to know who she is. And not having paparazzi stalking Kim all over the place, as is the case everywhere else in the world, she could be almost anybody. We may never know. She could be Kim’s sister, girlfriend, Avon lady or, considering she dresses kind of like Kim, his Girl Scout Cookie Girl connection. He kinda looks like a guy that would be into thin mints or peanut butter patties……very rare commodity in North Korea.
Then there’s the mini skirt revelation. Photos of female comrade women have surfaced showing them wearing mini skirts along with heels in downtown Pyongyang. This replaces the traditional drab Mao-style work uniforms which were quite prevalent during the reign of Kim’s father, Kim Jong il. (none of these Jong’s are related to Erica Jong or the board game “Mah-Jong”)
Could this all mean a thaw in whatever it is North Korea needs to be thawed?
On top of all this Kim has been spotted eating pizza and hamburgers?
This can only mean one thing. Somewhere in North Korea there are clandestine operatives who work for Papa Ginos, Burger King, McDonald’s, or Wendys who have secretly dressed up as women in mini skirts and have brainwashed Kim while he’s distracted watching Mickey Mouse and Sylvester Stallone movies.
All this time we’ve been trying to infiltrate North Korea using diplomacy when all it took was a Mouse, Rambo, pizza, hamburgers and mini skirts. Just think of what cleavage would accomplish.
Diplomats in Washington need to take heed at this breakthrough, as small a breakthrough as it may seem.
My suggestion. Scoff up all of the episodes of “Mad Men” with Christina Hendricks that they can find and ship them off as a gesture of good will to Kim. Might wanna photo shop her outfits to conform to North Korea’s dress code, (drab olive) but leave in the cleavage.
There isn’t a guy, including Kim Jong un, who wouldn’t say, “screw this cold war stuff” and succumb to the effects of seeing Christina dressed up in olive drab wearing a mini skirt eating a pizza or hamburger and possibly picking up Rocky Balboa’s accent.
“Soooooo….Kimmy comrade. How’s about you and I go a few rounds?”
“Ohhhhh Comrade Christina. You looka sooooo enticing in your official “olive drab lots of cleavage” uniform eating that pizza. I give in….democracy for everyone of my loyal North Korean subjects.”
“That’s great Kim honey. Does this now mean that all North Koreans are free?”
“Um, as sure as my name is “un”……. NO. Just that they can now eat pizza, hamburgers, watch Sylvester Stallone and Mickey Mouse movies and show the world they have legs.”
Possibly a further sign that North Korea is finally catching up with the times………………
“Kim Jong un embraces capitalism by changing his name to “Kim Novak.”
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