So, you ask…what exactly is a “cash cow?” Well folks, it’s the same as “milking the cow.” In other words, if you have a cow and it’s producing milk, perhaps even chocolate milk, and you can make a buck off of it, then it becomes a “cash cow.”
Cash cows are easy to spot. First you have to find the most attractive and influential cow among the bunch, see if “it” might be a cash cow, and, if it proves to indeed be such a cash cow, then milk it for all that it’s worth. Until either the milk or the cash runs dry.
BUT…..even though there are signs of the milk running dry, (shrinking udder syndrome) some brainiacs still attempt to get that last single drop of cash out of that cow. It’s called….”greed,”….or…..”We ain’t givin’ up until that freakin’ cow is a steak and we have to eat it!”
Such is the case in yet another reality show about…….(sigh)…..the….”PALINS!!!!!”
This time the network executives hoisted the cash cow flag up and snagged Todd Palin as the next bovine winner. Yep….Sarah’s husband now will enter the wonderful world of Disney…oops…sorry…I meant the wonderful world of reality TV appearing on NBC’s “Stars Earn Stripes” OH Gawd….I can hardly wait for this one.
Soooo, what’s Todd gonna do for us low life every day my life sucks viewers. We’re gonna be able to watch Todd’s career as a championship snowmobile racer. Not that there are other worthy snowmobile racers across the country that could do the same, but, THEY are not “cash cows” nor do they have the name, “Palin.” Which, as we all know…..is where the term “cash cow” originated. Lots of cows in Alaska.
Not to mention the other cash cow show, “Life’s A Tripp” starring, (geez, I hate using that word, “starring” because she’s NOT a freakin’ star) yes, Bristol (do as I say not as I do), Palin. And we all know how that “cash cow” was received by the critics. IT WASN’T!……because some of those critics smartened up and went and bought their milk at Cumberland Farms and Stop and Shop. Less aggravation.
Soooooooo. What do ya do when the cows all dry up? After all, there are only so many Palins left to milk. Yes, some smart ass executive did tap into the fact that the Palins are from Alaska and came up with the idea for a show featuring Alaska State Troopers. Why? Because Alaska State Troopers can be connected to the Palins because the Palins live in Alaska so therefore anyone who loves the Palins will absolutely love Alaska State Troopers and watch the program. Not that there are other state’s troopers that are much more deserving.
Will this ever end. Probably not, as long as there are cows left to be milked in Alaska. OR….if Mitt Romney actually gets elected to the Presidency. Then it’ll be a whole new ballgame with cash cows………or dogs.
Cash dogs telling their horror stories about being strapped to the roof of Mitt’s car in, “Conversations With Mitt’s Dogs.” Or, a reality show about dogs traumatized after being strapped to the roof of a car doing 60 MPH down the Massachusetts Turnpike. OR….a reality show about how corporations are really people and we get to see how corporation executives actually do use toilets like the rest of us. I see it comin’ down the ol Mass. Pike folks. Mark my word. Or words. Whatever.
Um, corporation executives DO go to the bathroom like the rest of us don’t they?
But right now I’m sure those TV executives are going to milk that Alaska cow for every drop of milk they can get their greedy hands on. Which is fine for the cows because they love having their udders stroked. (see chapter 16 in “50 Shades of Cows.”)
Let’s see…hmmm……..New reality shows about the Palin’s and Alaska:
“Mama Grizzly” A new reality show featuring an honest to goodness grizzly bear telling its story about how difficult it is to live in the woods of Alaska with various hunters continually asking for autographs because they mistake it for Sarah.
“Death Panel Roulette” Hosted by some other Palin, (I’m sure there are more) where the premise of this game show is to feature Alaskan seniors who have one foot on a banana peel and they have to spin the wheel to decide who gets their government benefits cut and wins the bigggg prize….death. (survivors of the deceased on this show actually are the winners as they get the old dead person’s estate)
And….my favorite reality show which eventually will be coming down the pike, (not the Mass. Pike in this instance) ………..”Whatever Happened To The Palin’s”
Now “THAT” reality show I definitely will be watching.
Now folks……The Cash Cow National Anthem:
(DONATE) The MisfitWisdom reality PayPal donate link is posted below. If it is not highlighted, copy and paste it into your browser and it will take you to the PayPal cash cow site. Out of respect for all cows, and MisfitWisdom, I urge you to make a small donation on behalf of creative effort and all cows who have been abused across America. Especially at Rockefeller Center. Oh yeah….Mitt Romney’s dog…….ah feel your pain….”woof.” Sorry, its all I could come up with….geez…I feel like such an ass.
Copyright 2012 MisfitWisdom RLV