Ok….I get it already. I’m not capable of making decisions for myself. Which is why I rely on all these people who know what’s best for me to make these decisions for me. Thank Gawd……otherwise I’d be a walking bowl of spaghetti.
There’s the off the wall “God appointed me to speak on behalf of the entire world people.” I won’t specifically name who they are but they reside in almost every town, mostly in the Midwest, who think it is their duty to restrict us and everyone else from the evils of the Devil. Namely things such as nudism, sordid lyrics in music, x rated movies, words that will corrupt our very souls, like the dreaded “F” word and related expletives.
Of course this all started many eons ago with the passing of the seat belt law. This was forced upon us so that when we’re driving in our cars and someone, like a drunk driver, slams into us we will not be propelled some 50 to 60 feet into the air making it difficult for police and fire personnel to locate our bodies. It’s much easier for them if we remain dead in our car. Oh yeah….while they arrest the unscathed drunken driver, fine him a few bucks, and send him on his way with a stern warning to never do that again.
Did I mention that if you actually survive the crash you might get fined for not wearing a seatbelt. Not that it should be OUR choice to wear one or not. WHY? Because most of us are not capable of making those decisions. Which is why others have to make it for us. Such as in whether we should smoke or not. Which has some merit, but….OUTDOORS!!!!!! WHAT! Are smokers gonna give freakin’ birds lung cancer or something?
When is the last time you saw a bird coughing?
But that’s not all that really pisses me off. It’s every single legislator who comes up with a brilliant idea to put more restrictions on us because we’re so stupid. For instance. “Trans fats.” Who in their right freakin’ mind gave a rats ass about trans fats other than some nut job who figured he or she was going to protect all of us from Gawd awful trans fats?
Then there’s New York Mayor Bloomberg, who as we all know speaks for all New Yorker’s when he announced that he was banning the sale of 16 oz or larger soft drinks because it contributed to child obesity. Hey Gov……I don’t care if some kid is fat….ya hear me!! Let parents watch over their kids. If they don’t, then it’s THEIR fault not the people who sell those drinks.
“But Misfit…..God appointed Bloomberg to act on our behalf.”
Here’s another one for ya. Yesterday I mentioned in my blog that a woman in Wisconsin, who obviously has waaaay too much time on her hands, wants to have a song banned from a rock album because she doesn’t want her 14-year-old daughter listening to it because it’s offensive. Hey lady! Get Real! Throw the freakin’ album out but DO NOT infringe on the rights of the group who made that album. It’s NOT your decision to speak for the rest of us mindless creatures who may want to hear or like that cut on the album.
Ya see folks……apparently “GOD” has appointed these so-called watchdogs to watchdog over us incompetent lemmings who don’t know any better. Obviously we’re all just too plain stupid to make any decisions for ourselves. Which is one reason I ALWAYS call the toilet paper hotline before I go to the bathroom so that I know the correct amount of bathroom tissue to use each morning. Don’t wanna screw up the environment by using too many squares..
Oops……watch….now some flake is gonna get the idea that THIS is a cause to take up and they next thing ya know some legislator is going to put regulations on toilet paper saying that you can only use so many squares per flush. OR….limit the number of squares on toilet paper rolls. Don’t say I didn’t tell ya.
Those of you who are Baby Boomers or older tell me if you survived riding in a car without a seat belt. If you’re still alive even though someone smoked next to you in an office or, Gawd forbid, outdoors. If you ever wolfed down more than a 16 oz drink and to this day you’re still average weight. If you heard a dirty word or saw a porno movie and you’re not blind, lead a normal life, and actually survived seeing or hearing that stuff. If you’ve eaten all kinds of foods that contain trans fats and they haven’t buried you yet. If listening to the word, “masturbation” in the Beatles song “Give Peace A Chance” made you a pervert. OR…..actually gave a rats ass about the religions of any of your childhood friends.
Yes…it was a much simpler life without all of these nut cases screaming at us and telling us what we should do and not do. Too much envy of power, the need to control other people, and the need to be recognized is what it boils down to.
My message, and yours to all of these flakes should be….GFY!
Oh yeah, one final thing. Listen to all of these candidates running in this election cycle and see if they care about any of this off the wall stupid stuff invading our everyday lives. Nope….ya know what they care about. The one key issue….”job creation.” WHY? Because, lemmings….that’s what we all wanna hear. Job creation.
Being somewhat sane, I think, what “I” wanna hear from a candidate is……….”Vote for me and I’ll leave you alone to make your own decisions and I’ll handle the deficit, the war, terrorism, and you handle the 16 oz non trans fat food stuff, sex, and listening to whatever music you want to listen to.”
Um….exactly how DO you create jobs anyhow? Anyone got a clue? Romney, Obama……anyone…….?
Finally….today’s tune that fits my mood due to all this bull***t.
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Copyright 2012 MisfitWisdom RLV