Aliens! They”re EVERYWHERE!!!!!

Yahoo had an interesting feature this past weekend on aliens. No, not the kind that Arizona is having a problem with, but the ones from other planets and some parts of New Jersey.

They listed the top 50 best aliens, so I took a look at some of them and decided to feature a few of them in today’s blog. I’m doing this because some of these aliens actually scared the bejesus outta me while others were kind of laughable.

Some of you may recall the very first time you ever saw a movie with an alien or a scary creature. Perhaps when you were a mere child and saw something in a movie that gave you nightmares for weeks on end.  For me, it was the movie, “THEM” which featured giant ants.  To this day I have “antaphobia” because of that stupid movie.

I refused to go along with my parents after seeing that movie to visit any of my ants.

“Comeon’ Misfit, we’re taking a Sunday ride to visit ant Martha.” No way!

The only other movie that still sends chills down my spine is “Anaconda” starring Jon Voight, who, ultimately gets eaten by that damn snake.  To this day even earthworms make me cringe.

I once visited my sister in Virgina, and, as I normally do when visiting places I’ve never been before, inquired as to possibility of any snakes being in the vicinity. Like to cover all bases. She assured me there were no snakes in Virginia, so I freely strolled across her front yard admiring the countryside, (her front lawn) when, all of a sudden I came across this huge snake.

My sister came to my rescue and stomped the hell outta the SOB, thereby saving my life. Then proceeded to pick up the snake, and dispose of it in a mayonnaise jar.  Um…well…..at first glance it appeared huge to me.

(NOTE) During the writing of today’s blog I took a break to do my morning walk. Approaching my truck I spotted a huge black snake lurking just feet from my vehicle, which is ironic considering I just wrote about snakes.  Did I panic?  Yes!  Would my other half help me to get rid of the snake? No!  Did I manage to scare it away? Yes! Is the snake problem solved? NO!  Because I scared it enough for it to slither into my tool shed which means that I now have the perfect excuse not to do any work around the house or mow the lawn.

Anyhow, back to other scary and not so scary “Yahoo” aliens. BUT…..first my own scary alien:

HEY! Is THIS scary or WHAT! And he’s from THIS planet!

Now the rest courtesy of Yahoo:

Audrey from Little Shop of horrors II. Which is one of the reasons I only have Chia plants in my house.

The not so scary “ET” who always reminded me of some sort of a golf club sticking out of a golf bag.

From the movie, “They Live” which I think is an alien movie about George W. Bush and Condoleezza Rice after he left office. Looks suspiciously like them if ya ask me.

“The Body Snatchers” Which I always thought was a movie about renegade undertakers. Once you see this movie you will avoid pea pods in your local grocery store.

“Chewbacca” from “Star Wars.” Soon to be a new television ad for non-smoking entitled, “Do Not Chewbacca.”

“Coneheads” which really didn’t frighten me because they were in high school with me and these smart asses always knew the answer to questions when the teacher called on them. Which saved me from being called on.

The clowns from, “Killer Clowns” which gave all non killer clowns a very bad rap. Which is why you never see much of Bozo the clown around anymore. (does one of these clowns strangely resemble Ronald McDonald?)

Paul from the movie “Paul” which was modeled after what Newt Gingrich looks like when he’s at home relaxing.

“Sandworm,” from the movie “Dunes,” Gives me the creeps because as far as I’m concerned worms fall into the same category as snakes. Never trust any animal that doesn’t meow or bark.

“Yoda” from “The Empire Strikes Back” which is actually a photo of what Ron Paul will look like if he runs once again for the presidency in 2016

Vincent D’Onofrio in “Men In Black.” Didn’t scare me in the least because that’s what Vincent D’Onofrio looks like all of the time. Cept for the drooling part.

Tahnee Welsh in “Cocoon.” Personally if I was going to be eaten by an alien, she would be my first choice to devour me.

And finally the scariest of all aliens, “Larry King.” From the soon to be released horror movie, “Larry King Once Again Returns To Prime Time Television.”

So there ya have it folks. The scary and not so scary aliens courtesy of Yahoo and MisfitWisdom.

Personally, if I were to make a scary movie it wouldn’t be an alien from outer space or some crawly type creature.

And, considering it’s mostly men that love alien type horror movies, I have the perfect alien movie that would scare any man.

“Alien Ex-Wives From Outta Space.”   (subtitled: “Alien Ex-Wives From Outta Town)

Scares the hell out of me just writing that.

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Copyright 2012 MisfitWisdom RLV

Header: chickart@cox.net

About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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1 Response to Aliens! They”re EVERYWHERE!!!!!

  1. Judith says:

    How can you say that about Vincent…LOL..I love him and his Bobby Goren character…I agree abot Trump..why does’nt get his hair sorted…

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