“Don’t ask, don’t tell.” Now this extends to penguins. Honest. Ya just can’t make up this stuff folks.
Toronto’s zoo, which is in Toronto, is splitting up a pair of male penguins whose affection for each other has drawn headlines. Neither one, by the way, is running for any political office nor have any other penguins filed sexual harassment charges. Just thought I’d clear that up before the media blows this way out of proportion and comes up with some penguin that claims to have received a payment or a payoff to keep quiet. Like maybe $45,000 worth of squid or something.
The two penguins have been the butt of jokes due to their affection for one another according to a recent news item. Jokes like, “Brokeback Iceberg.” one of them. Obviously in reference to the movie, “Brokeback Mountain,” which did not have any penguins it, as far as I can determine.
The penguins have gone so far as to build a nest and have shared it together. They may have even gone so far as to draw up nuptial agreements, but I can’t be absolutely sure about that.
Now the zoo wants to split up the two African penguins, Pedro and Buddy, so that they can be encouraged to mate with females. There was no mention in the article as to whether anyone bothered to ask the two penguins if they wanted to mate with females. I mean, this is something I personally would have asked the two penguins. Why split them up if they’re happy?
Have ya seen the movie “Happy Feet?” Obviously with all of those penguins in the movie dancing around all over the place they all seem to be enjoying life to its fullest. Who’s to say that with so many penguins dancing around on their happy feet that some aren’t completely content to be gay. I have no problem with that. Why should zoo officials?
According to those zoo officials, the two penguins have what’s known as a “social bond” but it’s not necessarily sexual.
I’m assuming zoo officials have never seen the two engaged in any sexual activities or have found anything in their homes, whatever homes penguins live in, nor have they discovered any items that may suggest sexual activities. Like a prescription for Viagra, KY Jelly, or home movies. (sorry, couldn’t help myself there)
I suppose the only way to know if the two penguins truly are in love and want to remain as a couple in public and come “out of the igloo” is to see what happens when they’re separated, and are paired with female penguins. If both of the males ignore the females and simply sit back and watch a football game or reality TV, which I assume penguins have access to, then, in my opinion, they should be allowed to go back to their original living arrangement.
I see nothing wrong with same-sex penguin relationships. Why force these two penguins to have sex with females if that’s not their bag. I say these penguins should “flip off” those zoo officials with their flippers and tell them to take a hike.
MisfitWisdom will attempt to keep a close eye on this story in an attempt to determine the final outcome. In the meantime, it might be wise for any penguins currently in a same-sex relationship at any zoo to simply follow the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy until Pedro and Buddy are allowed to carry on their relationship in the open. I’m rooting for ya guys.
When this is finally resolved, and Pedro and Buddy are allowed to return to the Toronto zoo as a couple, maybe we’ll celebrate with a party and serve the finest fish and squid and offer up a congratulatory toast to the happy couple……….
With whatever it is that penguins offer a toast with…….ice with something….
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