Herman..Were You Trying To Knead Other Things Besides Pizza Dough?

Ya just gotta love it when the news of the day is filled with politics and sex.  Seems like they almost go hand in hand….or hand in another body part. Not that I’m saying that Herman Cain had his hands on anyone’s body parts mind you. Innocent until proven guilty, that’s my motto.

Herman's your guy baybeeeeee!

Thought:  If the law says that you’re innocent until you’re proven guilty then how come they can lock you up if they haven’t proven you guilty yet? Hmmm, maybe it should be guilty until proven innocent. That way they can lock your butt up until you’re proven innocent…..say like for 20 or 30 years until they test your DNA.

Back to the story at hand.  Two women have accused Republican Presidential candidate Herman Cain of sexual harassment.  Not recently, the sexual harassment part, but the accusations part now.  Why now?  Beats me!  Could be politically motivated or could be the women think it’s their patriotic duty to come forward now.  Kinda like Linda Tripp felt it was her patriotic duty to take that stained dress from Monica Lewinsky.

“OMG Monica….is that….is that….what I think it is?”

“Yes Linda…and it’s Presidential.”  (do I see this item popping up on eBay someday)  If it does…jussssst exactly how would ya list it?  Historical memorabilia maybe?

Anyhow, onward………As reported by “Politico,” the two women said that back when Hermy was the head of the “National Restaurant Association” he made sexual innuendos and engaged in conversations of a sexual nature”.

(conversations of a sexual nature does not mean that someone had conversations outdoors in a nature surrounding….like in the woods or by a lake or something)

A campaign spokesman for Cain, J.D. Gordon, (no relation to Flash) said, “Inside-the-beltway” media have begun to launch unsubstaniated personal attacks on Cain.”  When asked if Cain was denying the allegations he replied, “yes.”

On the other side of the coin. The two women had worked at the Restaurant Trade Group under Cain, (the word “under” does not mean Cain was literally on top of the women in a physical sense) but they left their posts after complaining about his behavior.

Now comes the strange part folks.  Both women signed agreements with the association that included financial payouts and barred them from discussing their departures. Does me detect something rotten in Denmark? In this case, wherever the Restaurant Trade Association is located….not necessarily in Denmark.

Let me see if I understand this correctly. The two women left because they claimed Hermy sexually harassed them, Cain and his spokesman deny it ever happened, and the Trade Association hands them a financial payout to keep them from discussing what took place. Sooooooooo, does this mean it never happened or is this another one of those, “Ah did not have sex with that woman” episodes.  And we all know where that went.

Oh yeah….lest we forget. Eliot Spitzer and his prostitution bust. (now a commentator most likely commenting on others such as Cain) Anthony Weiner’s bulge. “That’s not me!  That’s not Me!  Former S.C. Governor Mark Sanford and his Argentine mistress.  “Don’t Cry For Me Argentina.”  (touching love song from “Evita” about a former governor who left his wife for his mistress  in Argentina…I think) Congressman Bob Barr who was caught licking whipped cream off of a stripper at his inaugural party.  “WHAT…..no cherries!   WHAT!  Oh….later…heh heh….I get  it.”  And, although he was cleared of any wrongdoing, Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas who was accused of sexually harassing Anita Hill.  “HEY!….what the hell is this on my Coke can?”   (look that one up if you didn’t get it)

I have no idea where this Cain story is going or if he’s innocent or guilty of sexually harassing a stick of pepperoni at one of his Godfather’s Pizza chains. Um…..wait….no that’s wrong….there was no pepperoni involved anywhere in this story.  Sorry.  Just two women.  Who MAY have had a hand in pepperoni at some point but walked away with a lot of dough.

So, we’ll just have to wait and see just where this story goes. Personally I think it will all blow over like the Sanford, Clinton, Spitzer, Barr Thomas and Wiener stories did.

Oops…..if I used the word “blow” in that last paragraph does that mean I’ve sexually harassed my blog readers?

Doesn’t matter. I’m not running for any political office so I can harass as many people as I want to.  Then again, I really could use the publicity to boost my blog readership.*

(UPDATE)  CNN is reporting that one of the women involved wants to be released from her “no comment” clause in her settlement with the Restaurant Assoc. Either way, the Rest. Assoc. is screwed. If they say it’s ok for her to talk, Hermy could be screwed too. If they say she can’t talk, Hermy could be screwed too, either way.  And….the Rest. Assoc. is screwed no matter what. decision they make.

(DONATE)  The PayPal donate link, which is set up to accept dough, but not any pepperoni, is listed below.  If it is not highlighted, copy and paste it into your browser and it will take you to the PayPal site where you can donate to MisfitWisdom then go out an order yourself a pepperoni pizza at your local pizzeria. Jusssssssst be careful not to sexually harass the waitress. Especially if the waitress is a guy, 6’8″ with tattoos and looks really mean.


*(NOTE) A heartfelt thanks to all of you who take time to read my daily rantings here on WordPress. The month of October was the highest amount of people reading this blog, (over 5,000)  since it began back in 1928.  Um….no, that’s 2009, with 2 readers….me and my other half.  Hope you continue to log in each day and pass this link on to your friends….and enemies as well. Thanks again.

Copyright 2011 MisfitWisdom RLV

Header: chickart@cox.net

About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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