*Rest In Hell.
Thank Gawd what’s his name is gone. Not only because he was one of the worst terrorists in the world, next to the late dearly departed Osama bin Laden, but because nobody could get the correct spelling of his damn name correct. Drove me absolutely nuts. We’ll probably never know how to spell it. I don’t think even he knew how to.
He was kinda weird. He wore bulletproof vests all of the time. Obviously to protect him from bird poop. His bodyguards were all female, 40 of them, called “Amazons.” And, he made them all take a vow of chastity. Which I think meant that they all had to follow the trials and tribulations of Chastity Bono, now, Chaz Bono.
His private nurse, Ukranian nurse, (yeah right) Galyna Kolotnytska, described as “voluptuous,” (bigga boobas) supposedly had a romantic link with Moammar. (expect her to be appearing on “Dancing With The Stars” in the near future. Either that, or in a future edition of “Playcamel Magazine,” (Libyan Edition)
Strangely Moammar had this huge crush on former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice. He called her a, “darling African woman” and had his own personal photo album of her which I assume he spent many hours with in the bathroom of his bulletproof tent. Just my guess.
He also had a fear of flying and heights. Both of which you simply cannot avoid if you fly. In fact, he could only use stairs as long as there were no more than 35 of them. (are their stairs in tents in the desert?) Maybe not.
Then there’s the wardrobe Moammar had. Geez, I wouldn’t be caught dead in some of the clothes he wore. Oops….I think he WAS caught wearing them and IS dead. See what ya get for wearing loud clothes with all kinds of medals and pins. Now if he had escaped, moved to Miami and lived in a senior retirement community nobody would have given him a second look. You know how seniors dress down there. All that plaid and stuff.
“And it looks like Moammar over there in his purple, red and chartreuse outfit with all those pins and medals has a bingo on his card….congratulations Moammy.”
So, as the rock group Queen once sang, “Another One Bites The Dust.” Seems quite fitting considering there IS quite a bit of dust out there in the desert.
So, in conclusion folks, it doesn’t matter how ya spell his name anymore, Quadaffi, Ghadaffi, Kadahffi…….there’s only one way to spell it now………
(UPDATE) As of late Friday evening a report surfaced that DNA testing of Moammar’s body revealed that he had been wearing a wig. Investigators said that Gadhafi was concerned about his vanity which is probably why he wore a wig. However, given the flashy nature of Moammar, I think he should have been a bit more discreet in his choice of wigs (pictured) so as not to stand out.
(DONATE) The PayPal donate link is below. If it is not highlighted, copy and paste it into your browser and it will transport you via camel to the PayPal tent where you can donate, if you choose to do so in memory of our late departed Moammar. Not that I’ll remember him if you donate, but it was a cheap shot at asking you to donate. Hey, one of these days it might just work and I’ll get a damn donation.
Copyright 2011 MisfitWisdom RLV