It’s somewhat refreshing to break away from the news that’s usually shoved down our throats every day. You know, political stuff, debates, stupid people and the usual cast of characters clamoring to get our attention. Although I haven’t heard anything about Donald Trump in a few days, so I’m beginning to panic.
So I was extremely delighted when I sat down in front of my outdated
running on a wing and a prayer computer and came across a story about boobs. You know, the soft and cuddly kind, not the Donald Trump kind of boob.
“The Stir” is a website that features things that, I assume, are “stirring,” henceforth the name, “The Stir.” A contributor to “The Stir” is Julie Ryan Evans who lists herself as, “mother, wife, editor and social media slut.” Her words, not mine. Although I must admit the word “slut” does have sort of a melancholy ring to it. (remembering my high school days)
Anyhow, Julie has put together five celebrities whose boobs we covet.
“WE,” I assume, refers to us male slugs who covet boobs. Unless Julie herself covets these boobs as well.
Covet: “To long for or desire,” for those of you who are not schooled in the use of looking up strange words that you don’t understand and do not have or know how to use a dictionary.
I might add that had I not wandered off the beaten path during my high school days, flunked everything, and as a last resort became a disc jockey, I might have gone off to collage and became an experienced boobologist with a very lucrative boobologist practice somewhere in Beverly Hills, California.
Soooooo……..as you can see by the photos taken from “The Stir,” these are the five boobs that “we”
covet. I must say that Julie is right on the money……or boob……or boobs. They DO come in pairs.
By the way, I said the “five” boobs that Julie says we covet. What I meant to say was that there are five sets of boobs, not one woman with five boobs. Although that would be an interesting concept and put that particular woman in great demand.
Speaking of boobs, do any of you remember reading a National Geographic magazine when you were a kid just to catch a glimpse of a boob that might appear in the magazine when they sent a photographer to some remote village somewhere in Transylvania. I used to do that all the time while sitting in a doctor’s office just hoping to catch a glimpse. That is until I read National Geographic one day, spotted a native woman with her boobs slung over her shoulder, (tradition I guess) and swore off reading that magazine again. Until I discovered Playboy Magazine.
I personally want to thank Julie for the enlightening photos and add my own choice for the one set of boobs that I myself covet. I’ve also listed my second choice.
(Note to Father Iglesias of Our Lady of Continuing Agony Church where I did my first communion. I think all of the confessions I did back then should basically cover any past coveting and future coveting, so I’m not coming back because I’m still coveting.)
My own personal choice of “Boobs That We (I) Covet” would be those, (boobs) that are attached to CSI star Marg Helgenburger. Attached quite well I might add. Now many of you might tend to disagree with me on my choice based on the fact that most of the photos of boobs Julie had chosen to highlight were basically the heaving, throbbing, voluptuous type boobs. My second choice is Bridget Moynahan, for obvious reasons…..”two”….which is the number boobs to a package.
However, If you’re into heaving, throbbing, voluptuous type boobs, which is fine, I say, “waste not, want not.” My motto. Why have more boob than you can handle? Nope, give me a set of boobs that are just the right size, do not heave, throb or voluptrue and I’m happy. (voluptrue was a word I just made up)
Hey…if George W. Bush and Sarah Palin can make up words, why not me!
I look at it this way. Why would I want to have a bunch of guys ogling at my girlfriends/wife’s/mistress/hookers/bingo pick up date’s boobs and get all bent outta shape. (I’m the jealous type) Nope, I want them babies all to myself. Besides, being somewhat over the ol hill age wise, it’s more realistic that my preferences for boobs would be someone wearing them that is closer to my age than someone who I might offer a lollipop to.
But, that said, you all have your own choices. I’ve already told you mine. I might also add that this obsession men have with gigantic boobs, (all of the ones Julie posted in her article) has its drawbacks.
Namely gravity. Yep…..gravity. Remember this guys. Submarines are gigantic and sink, and so do boobs eventually. But I don’t think Marg’s or Bridget’s will. So as they age they will always stand up and salute me…..and I of course, will give them a hard salute in return.
Ya have to think about that one.
(DONATE) The PayPal donate link that no one uses is below. If you care to use it to donate and it is not highlighted, copy and paste it into your browser and it will take you to the PayPal site. If upon entering the PayPal site and you happen to hear any moaning or deep sighing, come back later when Marg and I are finished contributing to one another.
Copyright 2011 MisfitWisdom RLV