Dissatisfaction with the list of candidates available to the Republican party
have led some to urge New Jersey Governator Chris Christie (R) to run for the Presidency. He has repeatedly said “NO” but that has not stopped many of his supporters from urging him do so.
At one of the Governators press conferences he implicitly stated, “WHAT….short of suicide, do I have to do to convince people I’m not running.” My guess would be, suicide, but, I think that’s out of the question due to the fact that it has such a finality aspect to it.
Just the other day at a school hosting a town hall meeting in Union Township, N.J., a sixth grader, Zack Martini asked the Governator for some tips on how to win a seat on the 6th grade Jr. council.
Christie replied, “make colorful signs, ask people for your vote, find friends to campaign for you and don’t make promises you can’t keep.” The kid lost. So much for Christie’s advice. He might wanna think about that strategy if he runs for President.
So…if Christie does decide to run, and wins, this will undoubtedly make him the second fattest President since William Howard Taft, our 27th President, who weighed in at 330 pounds standing six feet two inches tall.
This will obviously call for the immediate presence of the White House plumbing staff. If there is such a thing as a White House plumbing staff. I personally think there is considering I can’t even imagine the President unplugging his own toilet.
Why should plumbers have to be called? I’ll tell ya why. Because of a past
incident with a fat President….namely William Howard Taft. Ya see, whilst taking a bath one evening in his claw type bathtub, he apparently became wedged and could not get out of it. It took four men and a gallon of butter to get him the hell outta there. Not a pretty sight. Especially if you were one of the guys who just finished having toast and butter for a breakfast snack.
To prevent future problems they ordered a new tub which was seven feet long and three and a half feet wide. Big enough for Taft and any rubber duckies or little tiny Navy boats he might want to play with.
Now, that said, look at these photos I’ve posted. There’s one of Governator
Christie walking with Obama. Which is kinda scary because it reminds me of Laurel and Hardy. A photo of President Taft which leads me to believe that perhaps Christie and Taft might be related. Or, at the least, go to the same tailor. Scary isn’t it.
Well, if Obama doesn’t get reelected and Christie doesn’t run, perhaps they could reprise the roles of Laurel and Hardy and hit the ol comedy circuit road. There’s a lot to be said for appearing on “Saturday Night Live” or “Comedy Central.” And…besides that, Christie might emulate President Taft by appearing on “Dancing With The Stars.” Taft supposedly was a great dancer. Although he never was able to actually see his feet while he was making his dance moves.
So…..the burning questions remain. Will Governator Christie run? Will the White House carpenters and plumbers have to install reinforced floors and a huge bathtub in the White House bathroom? Will this also include a new extra wide EEEE toilet? If both Christie and Obama lose will they form a comedy team and appear on “Saturday Night Live”? And what exactly would Governator Christie wear on “Dancing With The Stars” so as to prevent an embarrassing moment similar to that of Nancy Grace. Hey, a nipple slip is a nipple slip. If you have THAT much weight on Gov, you could pop a button ya know.
Although I personally would rather see Nancy Grace’s than Christie’s.
To each his own…..my thoughts.
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Copyright 2011 MisfitWisdom RLV