Giant Man Eating Ants Attacking Earth!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!

OK…..OK….so they’re not really GIANT man-eating ants, but that’s only the good news.  The bad news is that they DO bite and they’re for real. Honest!

Some of you (seniors and movie buffs) might recall the 1954 movie starring James Arness entitled “THEM” at which time giant man-eating ants attacked us and the world was doomed……until Jim saved us all then went on to become sheriff in 1955 as Marshall Matt Dillon in Dodge City.  I guess he changed his name for fear that if the ants ever returned they’d hunt him down like a mad dog….or ant.

He was right folks.  The ants have returned. And where the hell is Arness when ya need him the most.  Unfortunately Jim passed away last June at the age of 88. Nothing in his obituary made any reference to giant ants, so I assume he passed away from natural causes.

BUT….in Louisiana the ants have resurfaced. As Leon Watson of “Mail-Online” puts it, “they’ve come to “ant-agonize” us all.  Apparently these hairy crazy ants, also known as “Raspberry Ants” are 2mm in size, are long reddish-brown and are suspected to have arrived here from boats in the Caribbean. Obviously a very wealthy species of ants.

They got their name because they are covered with little spikes, (kinda like the hair on heavy metal group followers) and run around in little circles like stockbrokers on Wall Street during a panic.

Louisiana Entomologist, (person who hangs around with various insects) Dennis Ring says they (the ants and not the entomologists) can get inside electrical boxes and short them out and even get into your computer. Which I assume adds new meaning to the saying, “my computer has a bug.”  In this instance, an ant.

Some of the signs that you may have been invaded by these man-eating ants…um…ok, ok, so their not man-eating, but I thought I’d just throw that in for the scare factor…..anyhow……signs that you’ve been invaded is when you go to let your pet out in your backyard and it will not want to go out there. Caution, according to Mr. Ring, if you force Rover or Tabby to go out into the yard anyhow, you will wind up having hundreds of these ants all over you in a matter of seconds. Ants in your pants.

Zack Leman, spokesman for the “Audubon Nature Institute” in New Orleans said that the ants gather in the thousands, bite people and overwhelm other ant populations in the area.  On top of that, pesticides have absolutely no effect on these ants.

Geez….is there any GOOD news?

Nothing that I can determine, other than the fact that if you live anywhere other than in Louisiana you’re pretty much safe for the time being.  If you live in Louisiana, basically your screwed.

So, in conclusion folks, if you happen to spot an ant anywhere in your yard with spiked hair and a really awful attitude that’s walking in circles…….run like hell.

Oops…..there goes another rubber tree plant. (Frank Sinatra, “High Hopes”)

Look, I only report this stuff to keep you all informed….no need to get antsy about it.

(DONATE)  The PayPal donate link is below. If it is not highlighted, copy and paste it into your browser, but be sure no ants are attached to your browser before doing so otherwise you will infect the PayPal site with these hairy ants and your donation may get eaten by these critters. Might wanna sprinkle some salt or sugar around your computer just to distract them before you donate.  Just to be on the safe side.

Copyright 2011 MisfitWisdom RLV


About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on and Kindle
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s