Job Creation In Ct: Be A Corpse Picker-upper…..oops, too late!

Hey, the hot potato in the next elections will be creating jobs.  Here’s one that’s right up everyone’s alley….providing you have an alley or actually live near or in one.

Yep folks, the State Of Connecticut, pronounced “Connect-neck-it-cut” and not “Connnect-it-kit”  for those of you who live on the West coast, (hey, I’m pronouncing it the way I see it)…..anyhow, that state allows anyone who wants to go out and make some extra money by collecting dead people to be able to do so without getting a license.

And, if you happen to dabble in embalming, that’s a plus because you can go right ahead and pick up a do it yourself embalming kit and have any corpse ready to be shipped off to any local funeral home.  Such a deal.

It seems that the State Department of Health, (which is a state agency devoted to worrying about your health, unless your dead) did not require anyone picking up a corpse to be licensed, thereby allowing anyone who, in their spare time, wanted to perhaps make a few bucks on the side, thereby stimulating the economy to do so.

But, at last report, to put the kibosh on allowing an enterprising individual with a pickup truck or mini van to offer such a convenient service, the state went ahead and passed legislation that now requires anyone picking up a dead person to have a license.

So much for job creation.

Here’s the government and politicians screaming that we need to create jobs and the State of Connecticut is eliminating them. WTF!!

I myself, having a Dodge Ram full body pickup, was all set to run an ad in the local paper offering my services.  I figured that with a full-sized bed on my truck I could have made several pickups in one fell swoop thereby making enough money in one day to cover my mortgage payment.

Not to mention the time I could save by sticking a dead person in the passenger seat which would allow me to drive in the HOV lane and saving time between pickups.

Now that’s all down the drain.  I’m sure as hell not gonna go out and buy a damn license from the state for $110 dollars so that I can pickup corpses. To me, it’s now a “dead” issue.  The idea of making a few bucks is “buried.”

Now funeral directors have a monopoly on the corpse transport business.  And they’re gonna soak you for that transport, along with all of the other charges they lay on ya.  The casket, embalming, makeup, (ya gotta look good when you’re dead) transportation to the cemetery, and planting you in the ground. I’m sure there are a lot of other hidden costs involved in dying too.

Ya see, it’s just not worth the effort to die anymore.

Hmmmmm…….wonder if I could do this under the table?

Maybe not……….stacking corpses under the table is a bit tacky.

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Copyright 2011 MisfitWisdom RLV


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About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on and Kindle
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1 Response to Job Creation In Ct: Be A Corpse Picker-upper…..oops, too late!

  1. Doc says:

    I used to do that job, but turns out most of the bodies I picked up were people just resting.

    But one of the bodies was my brother’s wife…when the police questioned him, asking if she had any last words, he just shrugged and said he couldn’t tell–she spoke without stopping for the last forty years.

    Conn-etiquette-ly (and NOT Connect-tick-ut)

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