Look folks, I can’t take on all of the responsibility of monitoring Bristol Palin’s quest to amass gazillions of dollars from stupid people who think she’s the cat’s meow for everything that she does or is doing. I just can’t do this alone…..only because I have my hands full of monitoring other stupid people who just haven’t been getting the attention they so well deserve because the Palins are freakin’ everywhere.
Now comes Bristol’s latest, “I’m Gonna Make A Gazillion Dollars and Retire At An Early Age” quest. And gawd knows there are many more stupid people out there in Oz land that are going to help her get there.
I ain’t one of them folks. Because I’m not stupid and actually have a brain, which is more than I can say to anyone who buys into this Palin crap. Gimmie a break here.
So now what is it? It’s a new book written by Bristol entitled, “Not Afraid of Life: My Journey So Far.”
Again, for the hundredth time this week I have to scream…..WTF!!!!!!!!!!
Scuse me for a moment.
(popping my usual amount of tranquilizers when I write about stupid ass people who think Bristol Palin is the model all teenagers should follow)
So what is her book about. It’s about losing her virginity to boyfriend Levi Johnson on a camping trip after getting drunk for the first time.
OMG!!! What a freakin’ best seller this is gonna be. Holy crap, run, drive, take a cab and head to the book store and buy several copies….run before they’re all sold out. Empty out the bank account, hock the cat or dog, borrow money from the bank, buy as many copies as you can. Do it now…hurry!!!
Only because I want you damn idiots to make her even more popular, put her book on the best seller list and help her make another several billion gazillion trillions of dollars…..so that, maybeeeee, just maybeeee she’ll go away….far away….maybe back to Alaska.
Um……might not still be far enough for me.
PLEASE….go out and do it….buy her book………..fools.
Now, for you female teenagers whose parents are busily running out to grab a copy of Bristol’s new book, here’s your opportunity to go out and get drunk, have your boyfriend knock you up, and maybe aspire to greatness like Bristol Palin. Isn’t that the example she’s setting?
Am I missing something here? Am I the only one whose brain says, “Misfit, do ya think Bristol is capitalizing on screwing up, or, just plain screwing, and making a buck off of it.”
Scuse me again….my tranquilizers haven’t kicked in yet……..
Ok, I’m fine now.
Anyone in their right mind who can’t see what the hell Bristol is doing, of course with the help of a lot of greedy low down scum bag make a quick buck publishers, need to have a lobotomy. FAST!
If you’re that stupid…hell, I’ll give you a damn lobotomy…real cheap.
Sigh…….I’m losing it today folks. Really losing it. You all know what the hell this is all about. $$$$$$$$$$$$$$. That’s the bottom line. Do ya really think Bristol, or even her mama grizzly mother actually give a rats ass about telling other teenagers that they shouldn’t get pregnant?
The simple answer to that question is….NO….for you damn idiots who think they actually care. IT’S MONEY!!!! for cripes sake.
Let me tell you all something. If I could go out and screw up big time by sending my kid up in a balloon, posing naked on Twitter, knocking up some famous woman, or getting a BJ in the White House and be guaranteed to make a hundred trillion dollars by writing a book on how to not to screw up, after making a trillion dollars screwing up, I’d damn well do it….in a heartbeat.
If my last name were Palin.
Which, it is not, which is why my own book doesn’t sell, and which is one of the major reasons I still have my own self respect. Because If I did do any of those thing to make a buck, I’d ad least admit that I was doing it to make a buck.
Besides, I already made my millions being an Italian stud. Um….I lied….I only made a few bucks from some woman who paid me not to pose naked ever again.
Unlike Bristol Palin and the millions of brain-dead people who will run out to buy her new book. I think the next thing will be a call from Hef and a centerfold, or, at least some sort of spread.
Aesop would sure have a ball writing a moral to this fable………..
Cause there are no morals, when it comes to Bristol Palin.
Copyright 2011 MisfitWisdom RLV