Osama May Have Been Into Pornography…OMG!!!

Camel with "BIG HUMPS"....a very hot pornographic item in Osama's video cache.

You know, just when terrorists think they have a good role model, it all goes down the ol drain.  It’s bad enough that Osama bin Laden is no longer around to show them the way, but on top of that, the stuff Navy Seals found in his room is making all self-respecting terrorists have second thoughts about the kind of guy Osama was.

I mean, look at it folks.  Years and years Osama kept calling Americans, “infidels” in many of his home-made televised speeches. None of which made it to HBO or Cinemax. Too bad for him.

Then it was revealed that among all of that stuff they found, lo and beholdith, and foorsooth, and gadzooks, there’s a stash of pornography. WTF!!

I know it’s kinda tough to be holed up a room because everybody’s looking for ya, and ya get kinda lonely just sitting around thinking of ways to blow people up…but…pornography!  The guy had THREE wives. What the hell did he need pornography for?  Geez…if I had three wives I’d be so ecstatic I’d scrap the terrorist stuff, film my own sexual antics, sell the videos to HBO or Cinemax, and make a fortune. The hell with blowing up stuff……there’s other blow..um……neverrrrr mind.

Osama denounced American culture for its exploitation of women’s bodies in dress, advertising and culture.

Yes Osama, but that’s the way we like it here.  Imagine life without Playboy Magazine, Victoria’s Secret, X rated movies, political and celebrity sex scandals. Geez….Entertainment Tonight and the National Enquirer would go out of business. Not to mention National Geographic Magazine.  (they have a lot of sex stuff going on with animals, insects and an occasional long-lost tribe)

According to Osama, (I keep watching my typing because I am inclined to misspell Osama and spell it Obama, drives me nuts….why can’t we just call Obama “O” like in JFK, and LBJ)  Anyhow, Osama said,

(using accent)

“Your nation (us) exploits women like consumer products, (you mean they’re not) or advertising tools, (take that Victoria’s Secret) calling upon customers to purchase them.  (only if on sale Osama)  You plaster your naked daughters across billboards, (not true, unless they are of age) in order to sell a product without any shame. (kinda true, but most of us get over it fast) You have brainwashed your daughters into believing they are liberated by wearing revealing clothes, (true, as evidenced by observing women in the summertime at a Wal-Mart) yet in reality all they have liberated is your sexual desire.”

Ok, Ok, Osama, we get it…but what the hell else is there if we don’t have sexual desires?  And reality shows.

Oh yeah….I forgot….pornography.

WAIT!  Doesn’t THAT lead to sexual desires?  Oh, Oh….it does.

So if pornography leads to sexual desires and Osama was watching porno in that room does that mean that he had sexual desires after watching porno, or, perhaps, just felt a little bit closer to his camel?  We’ll obviously never know, unless captured video of Osama with a camel surfaces, which is highly unlikely considering camel is the trademark of Camel cigarettes and they would obviously strenuously object to camels being associated with any type of pornographic activity.  Or, sexual desires.

It just blows, um my mind, you damn perverts, that Osama would be into pornography considering his comments. Like I said earlier, ya just can’t depend on anybody as a role model.  (sigh)

I used to look up to Bill Clinton, then I discovered he was looking down…..at Monica.  Then I used to look up to Newt Gingrich until I found out he was newting other women with his newthood.  There was Pee Wee Herman, one of my idols until he was caught in a movie theatre having sex………alone. And Richard Nixon,whose nickname was “Tricky Dick.” I don’t remember why they called him that, but it might have something to do with not keeping his fly zipped up all of the way and you know what          falling out of his pants. Kinda like a trick knee.

So now it’s Osama with porn all over the place, which is now in the hands of the United States government.  Tons and tons of pornographic videos confiscated by those Navy Seals.

This can only mean one thing……………..

Nothings going to get done in Congress because every politician is going to be insisting that, for the sake of national sexcurity, they need to view those videos. I totally agree with them.

We all need to see just what kind of pornography Osama was into.

For the sake of Camel cigarettes, our liberated daughters, The National Enquirer, Entertainment Tonight and our own perverted sex starved selves. Especially if it’s free and broadcast on HBO or Cinemax as a prime time special.

Works for me.

Copyright 2011 MisfitWisdom RLV

Header: chickart@cox.net

About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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