Herman Cain May Be Able To Raise Cane…after all, he was successful in raising dough.

Pssst....Godfadder....soma bigga shot namea Cain is outtaside and wishes to kissa your ring.....and hesa gotta free pizza.

Hey, if you’re successful in raising cane, and dough, then why shouldn’t you be a contender for the Presidency in 2012 on the GOP ticket.

Herman Cain is the newest of newcomers to the slowly mounting field of candidates.  I say slowly, because so far it’s been a toss-up as to who will enter the race and when.  Kinda like tiptoeing.

According to an article by Gregory Schmidt on Yahoo, Cain has everything it takes to be a successful contender in the next presidential race.  Next to the Boston Marathon, which is also a race, but not one in which Cain would enter, but if he did, would probably lose because as we all know, it’s usually some guy or girl from Kenya that wins the Boston Marathon, and, Kenyans usually don’t enter the presidential race for fear of bringing up the birth certificate issue again

Sorry….I digressed there for a moment. I have a very short attention span.

Anyhow, according to Schmidt’s article, the advantages that Cain has is that he was CEO of a huge pizza restaurant chain…”Godfather’s.” Now we all know that if you have ANY connection to a Godfather, you stand a big chance of raising a lot of money. Just the name, “Godfather” strikes fear in anybody who’s asked to donate to a cause, or campaign. Would you say no to the Godfather?  I think not.  Unless you wanna find  a horse’s head in your bed.

“But Godfadder, I only gotta tree bucks ina my saving account.”

“Guido, did is for da cause. You forka over da tree bucks or you sleep with da fishes. Or better yet, Mr. Ed….heh heh heh…..or part of Mr. Eds Head or tails Guido, your call……..but ifa you flip heads, you lose and get da horse’s head.”

“Godfadder….suppose I flipa da tails?”

“Den Guido, you get da horse’s tail.”

Schmidt goes on to say that Cain knows how to make a payroll, balance a budget, and execute a business plan.  Hmmm, or was that knock off a payroll, balance the books and execute any businessman. Not sure on that one.

Besides all of that experience, which would qualify anyone to be President, including Scrooge McDuck and Al Pacino, Cain has had experience as a newspaper columnist and radio show host.

Geez…..what more could any of us ask for when searching for the perfect candidate to run for President.

Newspaper columnist and radio host.  He could write his own reviews on his Presidency and then run over and do a talk show on the radio and get “Godfathers” pizza as his sponsor. What a match up!  Maybe even have a giveaway at some of his campaign rallys. Like…um…..I got it…..Godfather rings.  You know, like the Godfather used to wear in those Godfather movies and everyone would come in and kiss his ring. Nice touch if ya ask me.

Um….wait a second.  I think someone else is already using that promotion.  Oh yeah….the Pope.  Rats!  I don’t think the Pope has any connection to the Godfather however. Or the pizza restaurant.  I’m not sure.  Kinda strange that in the movies they all kiss the Godfather’s ring and when you watch the Pope, they kiss his ring too.  AND…He’s Italian!  Well…um….this Pope is German, but….they still kiss his ring and he “IS” in Italy.

Either the Pope has some stock in the Godfather’s pizza restaurant chain or Cain “IS” the Godfather.  Food for thought there folks.

Hey….the kissing ring thing resemblance is waaaay too suspicious if ya ask me.

Too bad Cain wasn’t the CEO of Cain’s Mayonnaise Company.  Nothing suspicious there. No kissing ring connection or any mention of Godfathers. He might wanna relish that thought.

Just in case, if I were Mr. Cain, I’d divest myself of any association with the word “Godfather” and immediately stop wearing any rings.  Why tempt anyone…… know what I mean. Ya get one person kneeling down to kiss his ring and, WHAMMO…..it’s all over the news and before ya know it, the Mafia connection.

So my advice to Herman Cain is to simply lay low with regard to any mention of “Godfathers”

Unless of course some rich Italian guy steps forward with a lot of money for his campaign race with, “an offer he can’t refuse.”

Be careful Herman……..remember what happened to that politician in the Godfather movie. He’s now retired and making a lot of dough in some pizza place in Bayonne, New Jersey.

Or is that, he’s missing and may be part of a pizza in Bayonne, New Jersey?

Copyright 2011 MisfitWisdom RLV

Header: chickart@cox.net

About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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1 Response to Herman Cain May Be Able To Raise Cane…after all, he was successful in raising dough.

  1. J Roycroft says:

    Wouldn’t it be great to have a president we could call the Godfather? I think it sounds much better than dumbass.

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