The Great Comic Strip Coverup

I'm leaving you for that MisfitWisdom take your damn dog and go to another comic strip.

Everyone’s so concerned with minor news stories like the deficit, jobs, Lybya and Moammar,K, G, or Q  whatever the hell his last name starts with that we’re overlooking one of the greatest cover ups in history. Comic strips.

I’m dead serious here folks.  Comic strip creators have been pulling the wool over our eyes for quite some time and it seems that no one really gives a damn about what’s happening.  Except for me.

Maybe all of you just don’t care, or perhaps just haven’t been paying attention with all of the other things you have to worry about.  But I’m tellin’ ya it’s a serious problem that needs to be addressed. I for one can no longer just sit by and watch the blatant abuse of our intellect. Do these cartoonists think we’re stupid or something?

Ya can’t pull the wool over my eyes…no sireeee. I’m onto them and I plan to expose all of them right now. So pay attention.

No one in their right mind expects me to believe that Dagwood and Blondie have two teenage kids and yet neither one of them has aged since the comic strips inception back in 1933. Gimmie a break here!

If Dagwood and Blondie, who by the way has somewhat of a sordid past as a flapper, were adults back in 1933, that would make them both well into their late 70’s. Do they look like their in their late 70’s? What the hell’s goin’ on here?  I’m tellin’ ya what!  It’s a freakin’ scam to make us all think that comic strip characters do not get old. Want more proof?

Ok, how about all those kids in “Peanuts.”  Charlie brown, Linus, Lucy, Pig Pen and that stupid dog. Now they first made their appearance in 1950 which makes all of those kids full-grown adults and most likely out in the workforce.  Charlie Brown is most likely Charlie Sheen.  Linus I think is actually Bill Gates. Lucy, being the b***h that she always was, is none other than Ann Coulter. Pig Pen runs a trash hauling business somewhere in North Dakota and that silly dog, Snoopy is retired and living in Germany still searching for the Red Baron. Dumb dog.

Need more proof we’re being scammed?

How about Beetle Bailey.  Yeah, he enlisted in the Army back in 1950 and he’s still a freakin’ private!  And….have ya ever seen him fight in any war?  Geez…..he’s gotta be in his early 60’s too.  What the heck!

But the one that really frosts my butt is “Dennis The Menace.”  Now that kid shoulda been in a damn juvenile home somewhere until he straightened his butt out and stopped being a big pain in the ass.  So like, how old is he now?  He was around back in 1951, so once again, he’s gotta be an adult.  Most likely serving time somewhere. Damn rotten kid.

And I’m not EVEN gonna mention Rex Morgan MD.  Oops….I just did. Anyhow… ya see him age at all. NO! It’s a wonder he can still hold a scapel in his hand without shaking. And….come to think of it….I’ve never seen him perform any surgeries. Um….do they do that in comic strips?

So ya see, its big scam.  Nobody…..NOBODY ever ages in those comic strips.  Obviously those cartoonists have discovered the secret to longevity and refuse to tell us about it. I say it’s about time we call them up on the ol carpet and make them fess up to what they know, when they knew it, and why they haven’t shared it with the rest of us. SOB’s.

If being in a comic strip meant I’d get to live forever and never get old I’d jump at the chance to be a comic strip character.  Not to mention the fact that I’ve always lusted in my heart, (Jimmy Carter) over Blondie. With Dagwood’s obsession with food, he’d never ever suspect something was going on if I were in that comic strip.

So that’s my ticket outta here folks.  No more getting old. No more writing this blog.  No more cleaning the damn litter box.  No sireeeee!

Ya see that photograph of me at my computer at the top of this blog with the Boston Red Sox hat. Yep. That’s me as a comic strip character and I’m gettin’ the hell outta here…………

Just as soon as I can locate exactly where the Bumsteads live and then hit on Blondie.

I can see it all now. “Blondie and Misfit” the steamy adventures of a blogger gone comic strip.

And, I’ll never get old.  Heh Heh Heh.

Copyright 2011 MisfitWisdom  & Blondie RLV


About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on and Kindle
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1 Response to The Great Comic Strip Coverup

  1. Doc says:

    To be frank with you (call me Frank), I’m bobbin around living as Popeye the sailor man, with my little dog, Toto, too; my wife, Betty Boop; and Felix the cat.

    I’m really earnest here…

    Ernest (or Frank)(or Bob)

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