Personally I think the only way to contain a Wikileak is with some sort of bladder control prescription drug available from your doctor. Geez, they advertise those products all over the TV and…….um…..wait a second here…….
Oh, sorry….I’ve just been informed by my editorial staff that Wikileaks has nothing to do with having a bladder control problem. Hey….easy mistake….who the hell knows what they call that problem in other areas. I mean, when people refer to that part of the anatomy, they use different terms, like, um….”woody” “foo foo” “ding dong.” I just naturally assumed another new word for it was “wiki” and that it was leaking.
Upon further examination of the news article, I see that “Wikileaks” are leaks of classified information that no one is supposed to see, because, as I just said, it’s “classified”….BUT….is leaked by an organization devoted to leaking secret documents so that people like us, peons, will actually know what the hell is going on in our government.
Important stuff, like…..Lybian President Moammar Gadaffi is erratic and is constantly seen in the company of a voluptuous blonde. Holy crap!!!
And that Ahmed Wali (Wally for short) Karzai, the half-brother of the Afghan president is kind of a nervous guy and tries to win over Americans with his nostalgic tales of his years running a Chicago restaurant near Wrigley Field. Holy crap!!!!
Or that the U.S. Government offered a “Let’s Make A Deal” to some countries if they took some prisoners off of our hands from Guantanamo. Like offering Slovenia a great chance to meet with the president. Offering Belgium a low-cost way to obtain prominence. And Kiribati incentives worth millions.
Personally, I’d take the meet the president deal. Hey, how often is some guy from Slovenia gonna get a chance to meet an actual U.S. president anyhow? Think about it….it’s not like we have a bunch of Slovenians all over the country.
Just where the hell is Slovenia and Kiribati anyhow? And does anybody really care? Except the Wikileaks people.
Of course there are some embarrassing moments in the Wikileaks documents. Namely some officials expressing their unflattering opinions of other leaders…..stuff like, “liar liar pants on fire” and references to some leaders mother’s wearing combat boots.
(I made that last part up just to spare some of those leaders the embarrassment of what those diplomats actually said….although I’m not very far off of the mark)
The most damaging revelation is that China was caught hacking into Google computer systems in a campaign of computer sabotage. This explains why my own computer has been running very slow and locks up so many times. Them damn Chinese are hacking into my computer. God knows what information they’ve stolen from me. Or personal stuff like pictures in my photo album file.
Propaganda!!! That’s what they’re doing. Stealing pictures from my file for future use in promoting their way of life. OMG!!!
Um….wait a second. The only pictures in my files are mostly of my five cats and a very sensual photograph of voluptuous Christina Hendricks.
I’m in the same cat-a-gory as that Gadhafi guy!!! Excluding the cats of course.
Ok…Ok….Wikileaks. Enough already.
(deleting all files with photographs of voluptuous women in my photo album)
Copyright 2010 MisfitWisdom RLV