Cussing Is F*****G Bad….But You Can Make A Few Bucks Doing It

Ya never know where the next big news story is going to come from.  I’m talking about earth shattering blockbuster get out the pitchforks and revolt news.

FLASH!  South Pasadena, California.  17-year-old McKay Hatch holds a press conference to initiate no cussing week in LA County.  HOLD THE PRESSES!

Not only that folks, but he’s sending a “no cussing” jar to Vice President Biden so that every time he cusses he’ll be obligated to put money into the cussing jar.  Holy S**T Batman!”………………oops.

Geez, if the Vice President is being singled out for cussing, we all better watch what the hell we say too.  No more “F” this and “F” that when some jerk cuts you off on the highway.  Instead, get that cussing jar out and drop a few bucks into it when something like that happens.

Might wanna keep your eyes on the road when you’re doing that otherwise some politician is going to introduce a new law prohibiting putting money into a cuss jar while driving.

Of course you could be one of those sweet gentle individuals who reacts differently when cut off on the highway.

“Oh look Martha, that silver Lexus just cut in front of me and missed my front end by inches.  Poor soul, I feel so much compassion for that highway challenged individual.  It just brings me to the point of tears.”

Just today I was pissed off…..oops….$1.00……..just today I was upset when some A**hole….oops……$1.00……um, just today I was really ticked of when driving down the interstate and some brainless Mother*****r…..oops…………$1.00…………(I’m never gonna get thru this am I)

Ok, Ok, I get the point. I should not be using cuss words.  I know deep in my heart that it will infect my soul, twist my mind and lose the war for the allies.  Hmmmm…..where did I hear that before?

So let me see if I understand the concept of this clearly.  If I swear and cuss then I have to put money into a jar, which will then add up, which will then allow me to have some sort of savings account, which, if accumulates over a period of time, I can then put into my savings account and eventually retire very rich……….providing I continue to cuss a lot.  Sounds like a good idea.

But then, if I accumulate lots of cuss money and put it into the bank and it grows and grows, isn’t that considered money that could be taxed by the IRS.  I mean, I tend to cuss a lot.  No, I mean really, a lot.  So conceivably I could amass a fortune, and I know the bank has to report to the IRS if I make too much money.  I could get F****D here……oops…….$1.00.  See, I’ve already amassed over $4.00.  Holy S**T…..oops………….$1.00.

I don’t think this is going to work.  It’s not that I don’t think it’s a good idea, but I just don’t want those bastards, oops………$1.00……..at the IRS…..getting information from my damn, oops…..$1.00…….bank because I cussed and made a lot of F*****G, oops………… money.

(sigh)

F**K it, I give up………oops…..$1.00……Son-of a…..oops….$1.00…..damn it…….Geez…..I’m outta money……….I wonder if I can put an IOU in my jar?

About misfit120

Former disc jockey, (Dick Jones) 30 years, and author of, "I Could Have Been Famous But Sex, Love & Life Got In The Way" available at Amazon.com books, & Kindle, "The Covert Chamber" a mystery novel available at Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble, and "Forgotten" the story of two WWI pilots who were forgotten for over 70 years available on Amazon.com and Kindle
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