Girls Gone Wild! Senator Mark Pryor! OMG!!! There’s more to this headline story than meets the Senator…or eye.
Considering a lot of U.S. Senators are official AARP members and have one foot on a banana peel, perhaps this version of "Girls Gone Wild" might be more acceptable when it comes to considering an intern,.
Senator Mark Pryor (D) of Arkansas is a bit upset that Joe Francis, (no relation to Connie Francis) who is a video marketing executive, who has made millions marketing videos, I would guess, is involved in an online auction which the winner of would receive an internship in the Senator’s office.
In other words, to explain it a bit more simply……Francis runs the show called, “The Search For The Hottest Girl in America Contest” and “Girls Gone Wild.” And the girl who wins would be an intern in the Senator’s office. Unbeknownst to the Senator obviously.
Sooooo…..how did this all unfold? It seems that “BiddingForGood”, a Cambridge, Massachusetts-based website which is a charity to benefit a child learning center, put up the auction to benefit the center. The internship was part of the auction and Francis bid on it for $2,500. So, in turn, apparently Francis offered the internship, which he won on the bid, as part of the “Hottest Girl In America” contest winner’s prize package.
I know, this all sounds kinda confusing but I’m really trying to sort all of this out.
Let me try it one more time. Francis, the video media guy who has made a fortune marketing videotapes featuring young women flashing their breasts bid on the internship and then as part of the prize package for “The Search For The Hottest Girl In America” is giving the internship that he bid on, and won, to the winner. Which ultimately would mean the winner, flashing breasts or not, would be able to intern at Senator Pryor’s office in D.C.
As far as I can determine.
(this was not an easy story to write folks….kinda like he did, she did, they said, he won, I got, holy crap I won, and you’re gonna do WHAT with that prize)
Enter the FBI……if Senator Pryor has his way. (geez…good thing he didn’t ask the Secret Service to look into this one)
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Senator Pryor, not wanting to have his office staff, as well as himself, distracted by heaving throbbing interns breasts, has asked the FBI to investigate just who set up the online auction that the founder of “Girls Gone Wild,” (Francis) says he bought for the winner of his reality show.
Pryor spokeswoman Lisa Ackerman says, “We believe someone outside Senator Pryor’s office has broken the law by fraudulently impersonating a U.S. Senator, fraudulently attempting to sell a government position and using the Senate seal, (not a real seal) without authorization. We have asked the FBI to fully investigate who is perpetrating this fraud against the Senator and the U.S. Senate.”
Geez….very heavy implications there Lisa. “Fraud,” “selling a government position,” and “using seals without permission.” Good thing they’re not real seals or the National Wildlife Association would be all over Francis’ butt. U.S. law states that you cannot employ real seals as interns. Some sort of Fish & Wildlife regulation I think.
I don’t know why Senator Pryor is all bent outta shape over all this intern/breasts flopping/ “Girls Gone Wild” flap anyhow. So what if a girl from the show wins an internship. No big deal. Hell, Monica Lewinsky was an intern in the White House and it seem to work out ok for her. However, she really should have had a “dry cleaning” clause in her internship contract. Might have saved all of us from “spermstainagate.”
“Ah did not have sex with that dress.”
Anyhow, in the midst of all this the director of early childhood centers, Carol Bovill, said that a “private party” organized to benefit the centers did include the auction bid from Francis but that they have returned the money and cancelled the item. I’m assuming by “item” they mean the internship and not some girl gone wild.
Francis also announced that his website no longer is listing the item as part of the prize package for the show. RATS! And here I was all set to pack my bags, head to Washington and be the first to capture some photos of a “Girl Gone Wild” in Senator Pryor’s office.
What’s a poor innocent “Girl Gone Wild” who has aspirations of being an intern in Washington, D.C. supposed to do? Damn you Bill Clinton and Monica, ya ruined it for all of them.
However….the good news is that ever since Monica’s stained dress was the center of the Clinton, “Ah did not have sex with that woman” scandal, the dry cleaning business in D.C. has been up 100%.
Which we all know is great news for the economy, and the dry cleaning business.
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